Page 27 of Things I Wish I Said
“Whatever. Suit yourself.”
“I assume you’re going? Which means your ass will either be drunk or hungover for our tourney?”
I don’t answer because I had planned on going, which means he’s probably right.
I can sense Cameron and Trent’s frustration with me. I’d have to be blind not to see it. I’ve been a shit friend and an even shittier teammate.
I wonder how long they’ll stick around before they bail entirely.
“You do realize if you’d been like this last year, George Mason never would’ve recruited you, right?” Cameron asks.
Leave it to him to bust my chops. “Are you my mommy now?”
“I remember a time when you watched your macros and protein intake. You took all the supplements. Did everything right. Nothing went into your body that wouldn’t fuel your game,” Trent says.
“Yeah, well . . .” I drain the rest of my beer, then turn and chuck it into the nearby trash can with a thunderous clang, then grab another and crack it open. “That kid is gone,” I say, already moving.
“What are you—” he starts, then stops when he sees where I’m headed. “Thatta boy,” he calls out as I close the gap between us and the girls. “Don’t forget to bag that shit! You might be high as a kite, but I’m too young to be an uncle, Daddy De Leon.”
I flip him the bird to a chorus of laughter. I should feel guilty about the fact that the only reason I’m lowering myself to the towel beside a beaming Hannah is to evade the third degree from my friends, but I don’t wanna hear it despite how right they are. The truth is a hell of a lot harder to swallow than a lie.
Dusk settles over the lake in a swatch of pinks and blues. Most of my friends are playing beach volleyball while I watch from my perch beside Hannah, trying to keep my thoughts in the present but failing. I haven’t had near enough to smoke or drink to stop them from drifting to my mother. The wish. Ryleigh.
Suddenly, I wish I would’ve taken Dustin up on his offer to tag along while they dealt tonight. The risk of getting caught pales in comparison to thinking about a girl I barely know whose cancer fucked her life up.
Needing a distraction, I turn to Hannah who smiles slyly back at me, her bright green eyes dropping to my mouth.
She bites her lip, and I know what she’s waiting for, so I lean in and take her mouth with mine. I feel nothing at the contact. No spark. No fire. But that doesn’t stop me as I slide my hands up her sides, palming her tits as she moans. “I can’t be in a relationship right now,” I murmur against her mouth.
She leans back, grinning up at me as she fists a hand in my shirt and tugs me closer. “And?”
And I don’t know if you’re one of those chicks who says she understands but thinks she can change my mind.
“I just don’t want you to get the wrong idea.”
“I can do casual,” she says, returning to my mouth.
I reach up and turn my baseball cap backward, so I can sink into her.
My hand rakes through her long, blonde locks, tasting her and the fruity sweetness of the spiked punch she’d switched to on my tongue.
There may not be anything special here, but desire unfurls inside me anyway.
Her kiss slows, her lips lingering as she whispers, “You wanna get out of here?”
So I can shut my brain down for a couple of hours getting lost in a chick? Hell yes. It’s the only thing other than trouble that seems to ease the constant fist in my chest.
But I don’t answer right away.
I ignore the bleating of my phone in my pocket as I slide my mouth to her jaw where I rake my teeth against her skin, then press another kiss there. I’m trying to decide whether I’m willing to risk this blowing up in my face, when my phone chimes for a second time.
“Do you need to get that?” she mumbles, her voice a throaty rasp.
I grunt. I sure as fuck don’t want to, but I pull back slightly as I dig my cell out of my pocket at the same time Hannah’s hands slide under my shirt.
Swiping the screen open, I see it’s a text from Ryleigh, and it’s like being hit with a bucket of ice water.
I may not be in a real relationship, but she and I haven’t had a chance to discuss the details of this whole fake dating thing, either. Would she appreciate me flirting with another chick on the beach and taking her home?
