Page 54 of Poetry By Dead Men
My stomach churns uncomfortably as I think about it.
It’s not that I’mworried.
It’s more that Bobby's become a part of me—another limb or an organ that I’ve always had but never really paid attention to. I never think about my lungs, but if suddenly I was facing the possibility of them being taken away for an extended period of time, I’d be pretty uneasy about it.
The bus doors open, and Bobby jumps up the steps, clearly still amped from the show. He collapses on the couch, grabbing me and wrapping me in a big sweaty hug.
"Gross!" I cringe as his damp hair tickles my neck. "Go shower! You’re going to ruin the couch."
"Nothingcould ruin this couch," Bobby's eyes twinkle as he leans in for a long kiss, and suddenly I really don’t care about how sweaty he is. "You’re only here for," he looks at his watch, "seven more hours before I have to take you to the airport. I don’t want to waste a second of it showering."
"Well, maybe I’ll join you." I climb into his lap, straddling him. "Two birds, one stone."
Bobby threads his fingers through my hair and pulls me down to kiss him again. He tastes likelife. Like fresh air and new experiences and somehow, at the same time, home.
"I feel awful I can’t be there to help you move in," Bobby says when he pulls back, his eyes crinkled with worry at the edges.
"We’ve already talked about this. You kind of have bigger things going on," I remind him, gesturing around the bus.
Bobby sighs, leaning his head back against the couch. "I know, but I feel like I’m missing out onyourbig life experiences while you follow me around to live mine with me."
"Well, I have four more years, so we will just schedule your next tour around move-in day, if it’s concerning you that much."
"Perfect." He kisses me, then tilts my head back to meet my eyes. "I have news."
"Tell me," I say, suddenly nervous, but in an excited way.
"'Gray'hit number one today on the billboard charts. The label is already picking my next single, and I think it’s going to be 'Someone Who Loves You.'"
My lips tilt up in a genuine smile as my stomach flips. "So, you’re saying thatIam the reason you might have a second hit single?"
Bobby throws his head back, laughing in the way I love so much, his dimple growing deeper. "That’s exactly what I’m saying. I’m adding it into my set next week. We practiced it today, and it sounds amazing with the full band.”
The anticipation fills my stomach with butterflies. "I can’t wait to see you play it on a stage for thousands of fans. How many people do you think will use that song to propose during your shows?"
"Probably at least a few a night," he jokes, then presses his forehead to mine. "I’m happy that's what they're picking. It’ll be like I have a little piece of you with me at every show, even though you’ll be back in New York writing the next great American novel or dissecting Shakespeare."
His unwavering belief in me sends warmth through my chest. "I mean, more likely I’ll be sitting in History or English 101, but I get what you’re saying."
"Whatever you’re studying, you’ll be amazing at it." He's looking at me as if I'm a sunset over the ocean, beautiful and bursting with color. Since the day I met him, he has never failed to make me feel special. But I don't think I'm the special one. It'susthat's so special.
"I’m going to miss you," I admit.
"I know. I’ll miss you, too." Bobby's thumbs caress across my cheeks. "But we’ll see each other in a month or so. And we'll be so busy, it’s gonna fly by. Time doesn’t matter for us, Beth. It’s just days passing until we’re together again. Plus, we’ll spend all winter break together,and then who knows what will be happening next summer? I might not be touring at all."
The idea is absurd. "No way. I’m sure you’ll be playing throughout Europe or something," I say.
"Well, if that's the case, maybe you can come along,” Bobby says, and my pulse kicks up in rhythm. Bobby leans over me to reach the end table. “Here. I have something for you."
I don’t know how I missed the box, seeing as it’s bright purple with an enormous, shiny bow on top.
"I was going to get you a ring," he says, handing the box to me. "Kind of like a promise ring, you know? Just something to remind you what you are to me when we're apart. But then I saw this, and I had to buy it instead."
"You didn’t need to buy me anything," I say, taking the box. "I know how much you love me." The word ‘ring’ circles in my mind. Sure, he hadn’t planned on buying an engagement ring. I know we’re not quite there yet. Even if I'm sure I’m going to spend the rest of my life with Bobby, I just turned nineteen a few weeks ago, and I’m starting college, and he’s a twenty-one-year-old chasing his dreams of superstardom without abandon.
I crack open the box, and before I can even take it in, Bobby asks, "Do you like it?" He shifts closer to me, peering behind the lid with a shy smile. I nod, tears welling in my eyes. I can barely speak.
"It’s beautiful," I whisper. The box holds a bracelet, a gold chain made up of tiny infinity signs, all connecting until they meet back together at the delicate clasp. "Just… perfect," I whisper as I hand it to him to put on my wrist, all thoughts of a ring completely disappearing from my mind.
