Page 78 of Kiss Me in the Dark
I glare at Cameron, not caring about the words I’m about to spit out if it’s going to hurt my roommate’s feelings.“You let your fag boyfriend spend the night?In my fucking apartment?Are you fucking serious?”
“I’m not going to take this,” Landon says, scoffing as he walks out of the kitchen.
Yeah, and get out of Cameron’s shirt too.
“What’s wrong with you, Fox?You can’t just treat him like that!He’s my friend!”Cameron yells, his voice sharp with frustration.But I barely hear him.All I want is for Landon to leave—and to take off my roommate’s shirt while he’s at it.
I stalk into the living room, and Cameron trails after me, his footsteps quick and angry.
“Is this your twisted way of saying thank you for last night?”Cameron snaps, glaring up at me.I look down at him, taking in the messy bun holding back his long, blond hair, the nerdy glasses framing his hazel eyes, and that annoyingly perfect face of his.
I know I’m staring, but damn, I want to kiss him right now.Show him how much he’s fucking with my head.
“Answer me, Jakob!”he yells, using my first name.I don’t let anybody call me that—not since Kendra.After she was gone, I couldn’t stand the sound of it.But somehow, when he says it, I like how it sounds.I want him to say it again, to make it his thing.But how did he even know my first name?Yeah, the day my father visited without my permission.
“See you at school, Cam,” Landon calls, already heading toward the door.
“Wait, Landon—” But he’s gone, thank fuck, and he’s left my roommate’s shirt behind.At least there’s that.
“What the hell, Fox!I can’t keep doing this.”Cameron turns back to me, his voice rising.“Just so you know, asshole, you don’t get to control my life.You can’t keep chasing my friends away because you’re some homophobic jerk with an ego twice the size of his head!”
I almost laugh at his insult, but I keep my face blank, just staring down at him.He’s right in front of me, all worked up, looking at me with fire in his eyes.It would be so easy to pull him close, to cross that line.
“He’s a fag and you know it.”
He laughs dryly, the sound stabbing at my chest.“Are you aware your roommate is also a fag?Huh, answer me, you idiot?Are you aware I like to fuck men?”
He’s never said that to me before.That he likes to fuck men.I hate that.I hate that I am jealous.I want to yell at him, to tell him that I don’t want him to be with other men because I want him so bad, it scares me, but instead I settle with;
“I already warned you, Cam.Stop bringing your boyfriend to our apartment.”
“He’s not my boyfriend.”He says it firmly, but I already know.I know they’re just close friends, like Blaze and me.But that doesn’t change the fact that I’m jealous of Landon.I want Cameron to look at me like that, to be that close to me.And maybe even more.
God, I sound more messed up than I thought.And selfish, too.
“You bring your friends over all the time, and I’ve never complained,” he snaps, fire in his eyes.“Especially when you decided to turn this place into your personal hookup ground.I tolerated it, Fox.You don’t get to control me—I’m not one of your little sluts.”
Yeah, I know he’s not like them.And I’m glad he’s different.That’s the problem.
He pushes his glasses up his nose, brushing past me as he heads toward the hallway.I can’t take my eyes off him.
He stops, looking back with a cold stare.“You know what, Fox?Screw you.This is exactly why you’re alone—because you’re selfish and a complete narcissist.You’re so full of yourself.”He mutters the last part under his breath before storming off to his room.I stand there, stunned, his words echoing in my head.
What the fuck?
As I sit across from Blaze in the café near campus, I can’t shake Cameron’s words from my head.
This is exactly why you’re alone—because you’re selfish and a complete narcissist.You’re so full of yourself.
The worst part is that he’s right, and it stings.But then there’s this other part of me that just wants him—badly.And that hurts even more.
I groan into my coffee and sigh.I’ve been drinking way too much of this stuff lately.I don’t even like coffee, but I need the caffeine just to keep going.Blaze is scrolling on his phone, barely noticing as I stew in my thoughts.Carter’s not here; he’s in class.
“You okay?”Blaze asks.
Fuck, no.Not even close.
How the hell am I supposed to explain this to my best friend—who’s as straight as they come and just as much of a homophobe as I am—that I’m borderline obsessed with my roommate?
