Page 98 of Studious
“Figures.”
“Listen, Danny,” Noah says. “You like Alden. And Alden likes you, right?”
“Yes,” I admit.
“Then tell him.”
“I have.”
August and Noah look at each other. Noah says, “Okay, then maybe we should stay out of it. We just thought—”
“I appreciate your concern, but he and I have some issues we have to deal with.”
“I mean,” Noah goes on, “if I had the love of my life, there’s no chance I’d let him get away.”
Like Noah’s one to talk. He’s been pining for his best friend as long as I’ve known him. Still, “Why do you think Alden’s the love of my life?” I ask sharply.
August stares at me long enough that it becomes uncomfortable. It’s like he’s trying to figure out what planet I came from and whether he can send me back. Then he glances skyward and shakes his head.
Alden can’t be the love of my life. Can he?
I bite my lip. “But.”
He whips his focus back to me. “But what?”
“But if he…” I don’t know what to say. All I know is that I’m scared to have him in my life and scared not to.
“What you should do is think about whether your life is better with him or without him,” Noah says.
“With him.”
“Then ask yourself whether you need to tell him that.”
I nod and take a deep breath. “I suppose I do.”
August says, “You do. You must know that he wants you. It’s obvious, even for those of us who haven’t talked with Shelby. We see how much time you spend with him—and how he lights up when you’re in the room. The only way you’ll get what you want is if you make yourself vulnerable. I don’t know what happened to you to make you close yourself off like this, but you need to get over it.”
I want to tell him that’s rich coming from him, the guy with unrequited love for Noah that he’s not even aware of. But he might not be ready to hear that. And apparently today is all about me.
Without Alden, my life is emptier. I miss his smile and the way he gets so animated at baseball games and how eager he is to share details about the TV shows he loves. The idea of being with him still makes me feel selfish, though. Like I’d be keeping him from living his life fully.
August apparently sees my thoughts on my face, because he nods. “I think you understand. What are you going to do about it?”
“Do?”
“You have to take action. You have to show him that you’re the one for him.”
“I don’t know that that’s true. But I know thathe’sthe one for me.”
“Same thing.” August gives me a look, like,I’m waiting.
“I’ll come up with something,” I say.
He and Noah look at each other.
“Guess that’s good enough. For now, at least,” Noah says.
“Hang in there, man. If you want to talk, we’re here,” August says.
