Page 90 of Studious
“I know.” He sighs. “But believe me, I could all too easily get carried away.”
“Can we go back to my place and get carried away?” I sound like an overeager teenager, but that’s what he does to me.
He grins and gives me a kiss. “Absolutely.”
We thank my mom, who gives Alden a big hug and invites him back anytime. When we get to my house, I’m dealing with a different Alden than the one I met a few months ago. One who’s sure of what he’s doing. One who knows that he can have sex and enjoy it, rather than one for whom it was a great mystery.
What continually surprises me is how much I’m enjoying learning about him. When you go from bed to bed, you learn quite a bit about the human body, and I generally know how to make things feel good for another person. I didn’t know how to make them good specifically forAlden, though. I didn’t know how much he’d love to be kissed on his collarbone. When my lips touch him there, he arches into me like I’ve touched a live wire. I didn’t know how he’d part his lips eagerly in anticipation of my kiss. Or how brushing my nose along his neck would make him shiver. He’s never had much self-esteem, but that’s changing, judging by the confident way he straddles me in bed and how he’s stopped shying away from my compliments.
Over the past few weeks, I’ve been exploring the concept of monogamy, and I’m finding it to be fascinating. Rather than a broad, shallow field of knowledge, I’m getting to know Alden deeply, and I really like it.
It’s not just his body, either. I know he likes sci-fi because he likes the science part, not the aliens. He likes to think that math can solve space travel questions. He’s fascinated by car tech and can recite Dodgers statistics going back years.
But I’m also learning that I like whoIam when I’m with him. And while I know we’re only together because he asked me for advice, I can’t help wanting… more.
So we’re in my bedroom, and before he can do anything else, I’m taking off his pants, sliding them down, and falling to my knees in front of him. Because I want to suck him off right here, right now.
He’s so into it. And this is one of the reasons why we get along. Why I’ll never get tired of him. Under that mild-mannered demeanor is a sex fiend ready to break free. And I love it when that happens, because he’s so refreshingly sincere.
“Oh, fuck, oh, fuck,” he whispers as I start sucking him in earnest. “Yes, Danny, oh my God, I can’t believe how good it feels and I don’t want it to end but if you stop I’ll die.”
I grin around his cock, then deep throat him and keep going, increasing the suction and speed until he goes off in my mouth.
I fucking love doing this to him, and it dawns on me how much I’ve changed.
Before, I’d been living my life for myself. Sure, I did things for my mom, and I took care of a cat. But both of them are pretty self-sufficient, TBH.
I haven’t thought about making another person a significant part of my life since high school.
But Alden makes me want to change. I want to both cradle him in my arms and watch him go kick ass. I want to be his partner in every sense of the word.
Except, when I told him I’d be exclusive with him, he didn’t offer the same thing back. And I can see why—it’s not what he asked for. He wants a teacher, not a relationship.
Oh, the irony. And anyway, I’m not sure it would be right to tie him to me when he’s just learning who he really is.
CHAPTER25
Alden
At the office a few days later, Danny leans over my desk and gives me a quick kiss. “You having a good day?”
His simple question warms my heart and makes me think dangerous thoughts. Because this is how boyfriends act, I’m pretty sure. But Danny’s not my boyfriend. Just because he’s not sleeping with other guys while he’s teaching me doesn’t mean we’re together.
I think.
I can’t help but remember what Mason said about this maybe meaning more to Danny, though. Should I ask him what our status is? Is that a dorky thing to do, or a sensible one?
Except he has enough on his mind with the trial, and I don’t want to overwhelm him with me, me, me. I stick with the easy answer. “I am, thanks. You?”
While normal people can have this kind of conversation without a second thought, before I started working at Weston& Ramirez, I wouldn’t have been able to make small talk like this.
I’m proud of myself.
He leans over, almost far enough to kiss me again, but there’s a knock on the door, and we both startle.
It’s Shelby, looking amused. “Hey there, do you two want to go to One tonight after happy hour?”
Danny’s face falls. “Ugh. It sounds fun, but I need to finish going through opposing counsel’s proposed jury instructions in my wrongful termination case. Are you going to go?” he asks me. “You should.”
