Page 115 of Rules in Love
Blue eyes and freckles smiled up at me. “Hello, Scaw,” she whispered, brushing the hair from my eyes. “We came to see Bunny, but Daddy won’t come in.”
“Oh my gosh, hi, sweetheart.” I swept her into my arms. Bubble-gum-scented curls tickled my nose. I kissed her so hard I must have almost knocked her pigtails right from her little head. “You are a sight for sore eyes. I’ve missed you so much.”
“I missed you too, Scaw. Is Benny, okay?”
“Hi, Iris! I’m fine. Come and look at my guts! It got ripped open, and they took stuff out, and now I have a cord plugged into me like an iPad.” I giggled at my adorable kid, and my heart swelled to see the care Iris took when gently cuddling him. Then I remembered.
“Iris, where is your dad?”
“Just outside on the couch, Scaw. He didn’t want to come in and make you sad.”
I had cried so much over the last forty-eight hours I was surprised I had any fluid left in my body, but apparently, I did, andthose words were the keyto set them free. I leapt from my chair and hit the floor like a cat ready to pounce.
“Benny, are you and Iris okay if I talk to her dad for a minute?” They didn’t even answer. Ben was too busy telling Iris how much of his guts had been torn from his body.
I poked my head around the corner of his room and out into the hall. I didn’t see him immediately but could hear him humming.
Three paces down and two to the left, I found him on a green plastic sofa a man his size had no right to sit on, absentmindedly gazing out the window. He made no move to indicate he heard or saw me coming, but the tinted glass showed a slight upturn of his lips before he turned my way. “Hi, Finn.”
He may have wished he had remained focused on the rain, as I looked a dreadful fright. But he never let on. He stood, and the smile that covered his face was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen, as were his tears.
“Hi, Red—sorry. I mean, Scarlett. Is Benny okay?”
He didn’t call me Red. Just as I asked.I hated it.
“Yes, he is, especially now that Iris is here. How did you—?”
“Teddy called me this morning. We got over here as soon as we could. I’m so sorry, Scarlett. It must have been such a shock for you.”
“It was. He got so sick so fast. The surgery went well, but he has a slight infection, so they plan to keep him here for a few days.” I’d kept walking as I spoke, stopping when he was within arm’s reach.
“Sorry I waited out here.” He motioned to the sofa and slipped an inch closer. “I wasn’t sure if you would want to see me after…well, you know. But I had to come and make sure he was okay, that you were okay.”
“We’re okay.” I nodded, sucking my lips into my mouth and releasing them slowly. “How are things with you and Jocie?” His brow and chin rose as he studied me with suspicion. My question took him by surprise. “Evie told me. Seems between her and Theodore, we’re up to date on each other’s news.”
“Seems so.” A smile warmed his face, but his natural glow was missing. There was no dimple pop, no naughty eye sparkle. I hated that too. “Everything was fine with Jocie once I calmed down and took a good, hard look at myself. My decisions of late have tended to be rather hasty and underdeveloped, I guess you could say. I’m lucky to have her. She’s given me lots of good advice.”
“I would imagine Evie contributed to that department too.
“Please, she hasn’t stopped.”
Finn shifted uncomfortably on his feet, unease written all over his features. I could see the words sitting on the edge of his lips, but he seemed almost too frightened to say them. Similarly, I was too scared to hear them. After starting and stopping two or three times, a burst of laughter from Ben’s room cut him off. “Bunny! Youw scaw is cool! I want one!”
A shared smile and eye roll seemed to give him some courage. Slowly, he reached for and caressed my cheek. Only lightly, and only for a second. “I probably shouldn’t say this, but I miss you like crazy, Scar. I wish…I wish I could take everything back, that I could be who you needed me to be. I’m just so bloody sorry.”
My heart demanded I console him, to hold and kiss and forgive him. But stubbornly, I refused.I am no man’s fool.“I miss you too. And I hate this. But regardless of everything that’s happened, you are and always have been exactly who I needed you to be.” His breath caught on a sharp inhale. His blue eyes were so heavy with emotion they became an unrecognizable shade of gray. “But I also need to be whoIneed. You helped me find my voice, Finn, and with or without you, I’m going to use it. I’ve stood up to Victoria twice this week, and I even told everyone about Ben. His photos are on my desk now, and his science award is pinned on the family board in the staff room, just like all the other mums’ and dads’ useless crap. It’s the best feeling. Something I wish I’d done a long time ago. HR Jan was thrilled and very proud of me.”
“I’m sure she was. I am too. We both should have done that long ago. In fact”—his eyes shot to my lips, then back to my eyes—“I plan to do the same when I come back next week.”
Come back? Next week?A million tiny bubbles of joy burst beneath my skin, and heat burned my cheeks. I tried to stay still and calm but could also feel myself bouncing on the balls of my feet. Finn noticed, and that dimple was back and popping.
“Oh, so Eves didn’t share that little tidbit, eh?”
I ignored that and tried to remain indifferent. “So, you’re coming back to work? That’s great. Jan will be thrilled with that too.”
A silent giggle shifted his body. “She is. She promised me cake.”
“Excellent. So, just to clarify… That means you’re not—”
