Page 30 of Beast and Remedy
She hunches against the table. “Vi must shift, regardless of what you wish. And we know that forest better than anyone else. I can venture with her and help protect her. Maybe even find a clue or something.”
“Sweetheart, I can’t have you putting yourself at risk—”
“I wasn’t there for Mama.” Marian’s voice cracks, and her head falls, hiding her pain.
My heart tugs at the helplessness she must carry. It is much like my own, but I think it goes to a deeper level for her.
Marian and Mama were on the same side of a coin. Nearly everything was alike between them. From their matching eye color to their bright demeanor and eagerness to be outdoors.
They knew and understood patience, being a balance to me and Papa with our short tempers, always offering support and comfort. Always finding our hand and squeezing it twice.
But none of us were there to protect Mama. None of us were there to support her. Comfort her.
And I think it eats at Marian the most.
Marian sniffs before glancing up. “I am going to protect Vi, as if my own life depends on it.”
“Marian, you don’t have to,” I offer, but her red tresses flip as her brown eyes meet mine, filled with determination.
“Of course I do.”
“Let’s get through dispersing some small squads first,” Jean fills in.
But anger and grief fill the room, making the rational and strategic decisions for running a kingdom harder to work through.
Everyone’s emotions are high, even more so since the mention of Mama.
Failure, helplessness, and remorse have accompanied us all. The great companions to misery.
They all intensify within my mind—my heart—my soul.
And each one takes its turn creeping forth for the remainder of the day, tormenting me and stirring up emotions I have constantly fought and forced down these last seven years.
7
We Can’t Just Leave
Magic festered within me as winter bloomed away from the wilting leaves and the frost-freckled ground in the crisp of early mornings. Time blurred as Marian and I patrolled Haliver Woods, seeking any wolves exhibiting similar symptoms. Papa ordered us to kill any potential threat on sight, and my sister did not hesitate to follow his command.
But our efforts to help our people disintegrated faster than we imagined.
Another person arrived at the castle, bitten by a wolf when fighting it off fromanotheranimal attack. He exhibited a fever, had oozing pus, and his skin was hot to the touch.
And despite his injury healing, the symptoms worsened. Just like Annie’s.
He declined rapidly, having the same reaction to treatments.
Hedied, and the world shifted with how much I truly fucked up.
He died, and it was my fault.
He died, and it was all because ofme.
All because I tried to help one creature while attempting to solve my own stupidly selfish problems.
Something incurable was spreading, passing between wolves, potentially other animals, and infecting people with untreatable symptoms.
More troops were dispersed to catch and eradicate the danger lurking and increasing in our lands. But how can we eliminate a threat we don’t fully understand?
