Page 239 of Beast and Remedy
Papa flinches at her words as she plants her hands on her hips as she tilts her chin up. Ice flares across her fingertips as she breathes heavily, scrutinizing my father.
Jerrick sighs, trying to calm down his wife. “Tove—”
“Don’tTove, me, Jer!”
She waves off his effort, pausing as he catches her hand. Rolling her eyes, she takes a breath, releasing a long sigh and recalling her magic. When her blue irises meet her husband’s, he smiles softly before she focuses on my father.
“You accepted my arranged marriage to Jerrick. And, yes, while the road to our union was not the most standard, you still accepted it.” Tove steps forward and touches his elbow, and I’m surprised Papa doesn’t react after seeing her power mere moments ago. “You accepted it because I told you I was safe, I was happy, and I saved my kingdom. You don’t want that same happiness for your own daughter?”
My father’s voice is calm, his demeanor relaxing as he speaks. “We can’t join houses—”
“Jer and I did.” She pauses and glances at her husband, the unwavering love between them stealing my heart.
A tear rolls down my cheek, and I wipe it away before anyone notices and flick my eyes to Beau. Tension freezes him in place, even as he holds my gaze.
I want to be near him, to touch him, and to be with him, but the brink of catastrophe sings and thrums through my veins.
“And if Jer and I did, why can’t Vi and Beau? Can’t you see this is what she wants, Bernie?” she asks gently when she faces Papa once more.
Pain and anticipation stretch my muscles, my bones, my heart as her question remains unanswered. My world upends, my defensive walls fall, and I lose my strength and composure.
I lower my head, resting it against my arms crossed on the table.
Loss, pain, and heartbreak from losing Marian, losing Beau, and losing Papa are unbearable. The stitches holding my injuries together pull as I break. I pinch my eyes shut, letting the tears fall, not caring who sees me unraveling.
Physically and emotionally, I’m broken.
Forever and always, I’m a disappointment to my father.
For showing weakness to other kingdoms. For loving Beau. For choosing Beau.
An everlasting damnation encases my withered heart, stealing the last member of my family.
I’ve lost Papa now, too…
My heart sinks heavily in my chest, and my magic tries to wrap it in a blanket of comfort. But even my power and spirit feel distant, like they, too, disintegrate from my very being. The silence is palpable, and the footsteps of someone are faint, muffled by my choked sobs.
Warmth touches me, trying to draw me from my cocoon. I don’t even know who’s beside me, and I don’t care.
I shake it off but hiss from the abrupt tugging of my stitches.
A chair squeaks, and hands grab me, strong and forceful. They pull me into a solid chest.
Arms encompass me, and a soft “shh” echoes in my mind.
My breath stutters as my father’s distinguishable voice offers soothing comfort, rocking me and cradling me close.
I shiver, unable to end my tears through my jumbled and broken words. “P-P-P-P-Please forgive me, P-P-Papa. I’m sorry I-I-I kept this fr-fr-from you. I-I-I was trying to tell y-y-you earlier.”
He combs my messy waves, keeping me close. “Shhhhh.”
“I-I-I know I’ve let you down s-s-s-o much,” I cry. “I-I-I—” I sniff, my face pinching. “I’ve failed you.”
First Mama’s death, the infection, Marian’s treason, and my deceit.
“You didn’t, sweetheart. I—I—” He heaves a sigh. “There’s so much that’s happened. So much I’ve needed to process these last few days. I’m sorry for shutting you out and not listening for all those years. For being so wrapped up in my pain. My grief.
“I’m sorry for losing my temper and lashing out and directing so much of that toward him. Toward you. And I’m sorry I didn’t see this—didn’t see how he made you feel. I’m sorry I reverted to how I’ve managed my own grief these last seven years and causedyouthis much pain.” His prickly beard brushes my forehead.
