Page 75 of The Ranger
California might nothave the coldest climate on the planet, but when you’re terrified and shaking with fear for the life of your unborn baby, apparently the world feels ten times cooler.
My arms are wrapped around my baby while my bare legs and feet freeze against the cold of the floor.
I don’t care.
They can fall off for all I care, as long as my baby stays inside me.Right in this moment, I understand for the first time in my life what unconditional love truly is.
I don’t think my mother would give me her leftover lunch, let alone a limb.
We are not the same.
I might be a single mom, but I will give this baby my entire heart—not physically, I do need my heart—and soul.Actually, I’m keeping that, too, as fucked up as it is.
But you get the point.
In this dark and dingy locked room, where I can barely make anything out except old office furniture, dust, mold and the sound of trucks outside, I’m having a damn spiritual awakening.Why can’t I be like Julia Roberts inEat, Pray, Loveand do it in Italy over pasta and some hot Italian guy who falls madly in love with me?
Typical.
Although after a decade, didn’t the author of the original story split from the guy and fall in love with a woman?Who then died.
No judgment, fuck who you like, but it just goes to show life can take you in some pretty unplanned directions.
Who knows where I’ll end up if I ever get out of here...
Clearly, I’m distracting myself.I’m terrified to focus on why I’ve been kidnapped and trapped in this disgusting room.How the hell am I going to get free?
Even if I did, would running out into the street bare feet in my pajamas while eight months pregnant be the right thing to do in LA?I know we didn’t travel far enough to be out of the city.
Yes, run for your life!
The men wouldn’t tell me anything and were extremely rough with me.I have a bruise on my face, my arms are throbbing, and my lip is swollen.
“Stay silent!”That was all I was told as a gun was shoved in my face; then the door slammed shut and locked.
That was over a day ago.
I’ve had no water, no food, no sunlight.I had to pee in a corner a few hours ago, unable to hold on any longer.What the consequences of that will be when they come in here, I don’t know.I can smell it, but honestly it’s the least of my worries.
I’ve been doing breathing exercises to stay calm for the baby, but I feel nauseous.It has gone very quiet, and every time I focus on what that means, terror rushes through me.
I close my eyes.Cole.
More tears fall, even though I thought I’d used them all up.
Why am I here?
Where am I?
“Oh, god.”I let out a small cry when a pain shoots through my abdomen.
Jesus, what happens if I go into labor?Will we both die?
Stay in there, little baby, please, I plead, wrapping my arms tighter around my belly.
Help!
Someone, help us.
