Page 26 of Nikola
A shudder wracked my body and fear wrapped around my chest like a constricting vise, pressing until my ribs ached. Memories I’d buried deep erupted through the fragile wall I’d built around them, spilling into the present with a vicious force. I squeezed my eyes shut, willing them away.
I have a family now. I have a family now.The words pulsed through my mind like a lifeline, repeating over and over, desperate and raw, as those long-buried memories clawed their way to the surface. I could feel them unraveling the fragile threads I’d used to bind them, threatening to break free.
I gasped for air, but it was like inhaling water—thick, suffocating, and merciless. Panic coiled tighter, pulling me under, and just when it felt like I might drown, strong handsgripped my shoulders. They shook me—firm and unyielding—jolting me from the spiraling void. My eyes snapped open and there was Nikola, his face hovering just inches from mine, his worried gaze cutting through the haze like a beacon.
“Nik—” My mouth moved, but my clattering teeth made it impossible to call out his name. The very same name I practiced saying when alone.
He yanked the handcuff off my wrist and I fell into his broad chest, shaking like a leaf. His arms enveloped me, pulling me close, and I sank into the solid warmth of his chest. Those big, gentle hands traced soothing circles along my back, grounding me with each stroke.
His palm moved up and down, and my breaths mimicked his slow movements.Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
It wasn’t until my heartbeat and state of mind were back to normal that I shifted back and snapped, “Why the fuck do you have handcuffs?”
Taken aback, it took him a minute to formulate a response.
“I thought you could handle kinky stuff,zayka?” I hit his bicep hard, glaring, and he feigned a wince. “Now, now, don’t get all violent on me.”
“Not funny.”
His expression sombered suddenly. “You’re right, it isn’t. What was that about?”
It was my turn to feign. “Not sure what you mean.”
He tilted his head.
“Don’t play coy with me, Skye. That was a full-blown panic attack.” A shudder rolled down my spine, and I inhaled a deep breath before releasing it slowly. “Did someone hurt you?” I shook my head and his eyes narrowed on me. “Don’t fucking lie to me.”
I sighed, rubbing my forehead before answering him with shaky fingers. “Honestly, I completely forgot about it until those stupid handcuffs.”
“Forgot what?”
“A memory.”
“Explain!”
Nikola could be so demanding.
“It was before Sasha and Branka adopted me.” I paused, but he didn’t interrupt, so I just continued. “This woman… While I was in foster care, she would handcuff me to a radiator so I would stay put. I completely forgot about it.”
I rubbed my wrists, realizing it was impossible to forget something like that, but I’d subconsciously buried it. I didn’t want to dwell on the bad, but rather focus on all the good things that had happened to me.
“What was her name?” Nikola’s cold expression should have sent me running, but instead all I could find in my heart was gratitude. That was who this man was. Overprotective. Overbearing. Over-controlling. Everything he did was over the top.
Just like Papa. Just like Sasha.
It was why I found comfort in Nikola. He represented safety, which I’d only ever found in the two most important men in my life. They were both father figures in my eyes and I’d never give them up.
“Skye, I’m waiting for that name.”
I shrugged.
“I have no idea, Nikola. Honestly, I willed myself to forget. I don’t even remember what she looked like. I just remember that stupid radiator, its heat, and the handcuffs.”
He cupped my face, his eyes boring into me.
“I will find her.”
I shook my head. “It’s not worth it. Honestly, she’s probably dead. Someone said that my caretakers died, so she must have been one of them.”
