Page 35 of Thorns of Silence
Maybe he’s sadistic and enjoys taunting me,my mind whispered. Well, duh. Of course he was. The bottom line was that I was such an insignificant part of him that he’d rather not acknowledge our time together two years ago.
And I still wanted him. How degrading was that?
He was brutal, cruel, and possibly insane. I was done shedding tears for him. All my longing now belonged to a tiny human being that was somewhere out there in the world. I needed to find my baby. I couldn’t live without knowing whether my child was happy. Grandma refused to tell me anything. She said it was confidential and she had to sign an agreement, swearing she didn’t know.
Well, fuck that.
This was no longer about me or him, my family or his. This was about doing whatever it took to find my child. It was my job to protect my baby, and I’d failed.
A shadow came up to me and I startled, forgetting all about Dante who was still following behind me.
“What do you want?”I signed, angry at the way my stomach fluttered. He looked good, the sculpted muscles barely concealed by his three-piece suit. He looked like the picture of sophistication, but you’d be a fool to miss the raw strength and danger lurking under the surface.
“Forgot I was here?” he signed, shaking his head incredulously, as if that offended him.Jesus Christ!I couldn’t even believe his brazen attitude. He abandoned me while pregnant and here he was, being reckless with my emotions, ruining my evening,burning down a restaurant. And all the while, he didn’t even dare broach the subject of our shared history.
I could confront him, but then what would that do? Show my desperation, my bleeding, pathetic heart? No, it was best I didn’t bring it up. He wasn’t worth it.
I resumed walking, his step in sync with mine. He pulled out a cigarette, apparently a habit he picked up over the last two years. His stubbled jaw was impressive even with the cigarette in his mouth, despite the fact I found the habit revolting.
“You shouldn’t smoke,”I found myself signing.“It’s a slow death.”
Not that I care,I tried to convince myself. In fact, getting rid of him would be one less monster in this world.
“So you do care,” he stated, a lazy grin splayed out on his face.
I flicked a glance over my shoulder to the blazing flames that the firemen were trying to extinguish, then shook my head.
“Don’t flatter yourself.”
I resumed walking until his next question almost caused me to miss a step. “What is your problem with me?”
I didn’t know whether to be offended or furious that he would even ask.
“We don’t have enough time to cover all that.”
“Jesus.” He pushed his other hand through his hair as he inhaled another puff of smoke. “I thought you’d be partial to me since, you know, I saved you when you and your sister broke my mother’s vase.”
I rolled my eyes.“As if my papà would have let anything happen to us.”
Although sometimes I wondered. He left us in Grandma’s care. He was rarely around. Whenever we needed him, he wasn’t there.
He raised an eyebrow and the cigarette in his mouth twitched. “You really think so?”
No, I didn’t, but I certainly wouldn’t be admitting that to him right now.
We continued walking in silence for a bit. His strong fingers tapped incessantly against his thigh as we walked, almost as if he had so much energy bubbling inside him, he’d erupt any minute.
“You remind me of dandelions.” This time I tripped, and I would have fallen on my face had his fingers not curled around my elbow, digging into my flesh to hold me up. “Stop being clumsy,” he signed, annoyance clear on his face.
I stopped abruptly, turning to face him and bumping into him instead. I braced my hand on his stomach and heat burned through his white dress shirt. Gosh, his abs had to be rock solid. My fingers unwillingly curled into the muscles, and for a moment I feared I’d pull him closer to me.
“What did you call me?” My hands shook and my anger simmered, but sanity prevailed and I stepped back. He was either too blind to see it or didn’t give a shit. Probably the latter.
His eyes narrowed as he slowly walked around me, his appraising gaze leaving tingling trails in its wake.
“Dandelion,” he signed. “The flower is resilient, symbolizing survival and rebellion.” My heart climbed into my throat. “I want to fuck you.” Heat flooded my face, my own emotions giving me a whiplash. An outrageously inappropriate throb pulsed deep within my core, making me clench my thighs the second he signed the next words. “I’ll make it good for you.”
His hand tightened around mine, making my pulse jump as he pulled me closer. My breasts pressed against him and a shiver rolled through me. He lowered his head, then ran his face up and down my neck.
