Page 57 of Contract of a Billionaire
Istared at my reflection in the mirror.
I wore a sweater dress that hid my little bump. The tiny life that we created somewhere in Asia; maybe it was in Kyoto. I’d like that. It was where I felt the happiest when I danced with him under the rainy sky, both of us laughing.
Alessio had swept me off my feet. Scrambled my mind. Made me lose all my senses. I left Canada without getting the depo shot. And without pills. Jesus Christ. I’ve had months of sex with Alessio without a single thought about protection.
That was what happened when you lost your mind. Yet, I couldn’t quite find it in me to regret it.
Even after all of these weeks, months, my body trembled every time I thought about him. The emptiness since I walked out lingered in my chest and on my skin. I missed him so much that each heartbeat fucking hurt. My heart ached for something we could have had, but now never would.
There were so many days and nights I wanted to call him. This love for him grew too big for my chest, ready to explode. To beg him to love me. I wanted to be enough for him, just as he was for me.
Thankfully, my pride held steady. I was better than this. I’d survive it. One day the memories would no longer bring pain.One day.
My brown eyes stared back at me. I hated the color. I hated that it betrayed how I felt. I wanted to hide my pain from the world. Especially from Alessio. He filled my cracks so perfectly, only to use a sledgehammer and cause irreparable damage.
A tear ran down my cheek and I wiped it with a frustrated sigh.
Tears didn’t help. It’d only make me look more pathetic. My hand drifted over my lower belly and my chest fluttered. A baby. Our baby.
My eyes roamed over my body. It was the same but then it wasn’t. Would Alessio notice it? My stomach twisted into a knot. My chest tightened. God, I hadn’t even seen him yet and I was falling apart.
Maybe I should change?
I went through five outfits. It started with jeans but they accented my baby bump. I was three months along. It was peculiar how a little pink plus sign could change so much.
I cried. Then I cried some more. I had never cried so much in my life.
My chest never stopped aching. The happiness turned into bitterness. And then I cried again.
But I knew I couldn’t keep this secret from Alessio. He deserved to know. Heshouldknow. Before I could change my stupid clothes again, I left the hotel room with the determination I didn’t feel.
Each step I took in the direction of his address felt heavier than the last.
I dreaded seeing him. The pain was still raw. Fresh. The weeks went on and I hoped it would ease. It didn’t. The pregnancy had made me even more emotional. Rain made me cry. Sun made me cry. Seeing ripped up jeans made me cry. Everything made me fucking cry.
Before I knew it, I stood at the doorstep of the address Alessio gave me. It was only ten minutes from my hotel. I wished it was farther. I wished it was closer.
It had to be another symptom of the pregnancy and hormones. Indecisiveness.
God, we were doomed from the start.
I was just too naive to hope. To want what my parents had. To dream with him.
I inhaled deeply, then slowly exhaled, forming tiny white puffs in the air. I pulled my coat tighter around me and took the first step up to the fancy townhouse in central London. February in London wasn’t such a joyous occasion. The cold and the gloomy weather reflected my mood.
Before I had a chance to ring the bell, the door opened.
My eyes lifted to find Alessio’s guy, Ricardo, standing in front of me. Frowning. A dark expression on his face.
He never said much when I saw him. More often than not, he’d accompany Alessio on his trips. Bodyguard or something. Thankfully, he never came along for our dates.
“Umm, hey,” I muttered. “I-is Alessio here?”
Ricardo’s expression was guarded but something about the darkness in his eyes unnerved me. He tilted his chin up the stairs. “In the bedroom.”
I blinked, then flickered a hesitant look up the stairs. “In the bedroom?” I repeated slowly, my body suddenly warm. The damn, traitorous, single-track minded body.
Ricardo muttered something under his breath. My eyes darted back to him, but the only word that followed was, “Yes.”
