“Almost,” I choked out and her small body retched again, throwing up what little contents remained in her stomach. Marissa and Daphne shook, barely holding their tears. I couldn’t blame them. I didn’t allow them to come to these two years ago. It was a hard thing to watch.
Dr. Guzman came in and took her temperature and vitals. “We are done for the day,” he told the nurse. We made it to two hours and thirty minutes. I raised my eyes to him. I was sure I smelled like throw up, we both did.
“She did well, Brianna,” he assured me with a smile. “She’ll have to rest for the next week, and we’ll do it again next Wednesday.”
Disappointment was bitter and felt like a heavy lead in the pit of my stomach. It was stupid, because I hoped he’d say she was all cured. I knew it was impossible but it still didn’t stop me from hoping.
The moment Emma was unhooked from all the IVs, she clung to me. The doctor and nurses left, leaving Daphne, Marissa, Emma, and me alone.
“I don’t know how you can do it,” Daphne whispered, her voice shaking. Weren’t those similar words I told Dr. Guzman this morning? I wasn’t doing it well. I wanted to protect Emma from this pain but failed. You always think what have I done that made her sick. Did I eat too many sweets? Did I not eat enough vegetables while pregnant? Dr. Guzman told me none of that matters but it still nagged at me.
“Can I get a ride with you back to my place? I want to be in the back with Emma, in case she gets sick again.”
I was grateful for them. They gathered all the stuff and carried the bags, while I carried Emma in my arms, wrapped in the blanket. When we exited the hospital, I recognized two of Mateo’s men. I forgot he was having the girls watched.
They were surprised to see me too. Their eyes darted between Emma in my arms and me, then to Marissa and Daphne.
“Is she okay?” I wasn’t sure which guy asked.
“Yes,” I told him. “Are you both driving together?” Upon his nod, I continued, “Would you mind driving my Jeep back to my place? I’ll ride with Marissa and Daphne.”
He extended his palm in answer so I murmured my thanks as I struggled holding Emma and digging for my keys. His hand reached to Emma’s back, steading her.
“Thank you,” I told him again. “I am so sorry. I don’t know your name. Or your friend’s.”
“Lorenzo and that is Paolo.”
I smiled. “Thank you, Lorenzo and Paolo.”
It took us less than twenty minutes to get back to my cottage. I kept praying Emma would make the ride without getting sick. Her little body trembled and the moment I took her out of the car seat and Marissa’s car, she threw up again.
She cried as I held her, facing frontwards, both of us hunched over. “Mommy, I don’t feel good,” she cried, as her little body shook.
“I know,” I murmured, pulling her hair out of her face.
“What can I do?” Lorenzo’s voice was right behind me.
“Mommy.” I felt so powerless. She couldn’t understand why she felt sick and there was nothing I could do to make her better, except to hold her.
“It’s okay, baby,” I held her tight. “Shhhh. I got you.”
I turned my face to Lorenzo. “Tell Marissa to get a bath together,” my voice was shaking. “Please.”
Thirty-Four
Mateo
The feeling of waking up with Brianna next to me was pure happiness. Her body snuggled next to mine, her hand on my chest and my heart beating underneath her palm. It felt right. She slowly started to open up. There were still things she held back, and I started to understand why. Being a senator's daughter, she must have grown up under scrutiny and was used to keeping herself at a distance.
I hated leaving her in the morning but at least she was in my bed, in my house. And she would be bringing Emma soon too. We might even have a baby of our own. If people knew, they’d laugh. I resisted the idea of a family and having my own children. And here I was, jumping right into it with Brianna. It would only be with her.
It’s selfish to pull her into my world.
But my heart didn’t care. It wanted her. I would have it all with her. We were good together.
I had been in the meetings all morning and couldn’t wait to get out. Antonio arranged a meeting with Declan for later today, and I knew it made him agitated. He wanted to have it first thing this morning, to get it out of the way. He kept coming in and leaving, agitation written all over him.
The moment my meeting was over, I strode back into my office. I wanted to call Brianna and hear her voice.