Page 43 of Shadowing Charlotte
She chuckled, writing something on one of the papers.
"It doesn't matter what I want to know. What is important is how much you would like to share with me. We can talk about your childhood or your parents. If that isn't a good starting point for you, you can tell me about your job, or how you and Alexander met."
"And you won't tell anyone what we talk about?"
"Unless someone is in immediate danger, I am not allowed to share any details of your life to anyone," she assured me.
"Did Alexander tell you he was stalking me?" I didn't mean to say it, but the words spilled out without a second thought. Her eyebrows rose, but she said nothing, making another small note on the page.
"He did not…" she finally replied, looking up at me. "But you two are—"
"Dating, yes…" I replied. "Does that make me sort of fucked up, dating the person that followed me around for two years?" It felt strange telling anyone the nature of our relationship, but also rather relieving. I adored Lex, but it felt nice to be able to speak so truthfully about how we had met.
"Alright, so tell me more about that," Dr. Stonebrook urged.
"Well, I always knew he was following me—suspected it—rather," I confessed.
"And it didn't occur to you to call the police?" she asked, her brows knitting together in concern.
"No," I answered honestly. "I mean… Logically, I should have, but… I guess I sort of liked it. The attention. Even if I didn't know who it was from." Another scribble on the paper; a slight nod of her head.
"And where do you think that stems from?" she inquired.
"What?"
"Your craving for attention, regardless of the source," she elaborated. My jaw clenched, my pulse racing as I blinked back the tears that sprang into my eyes. I didn't crave attention. No, that wasn't it. I got enough attention from my friends, Adam, my father… It wasn't attention I wanted. It was the need to be understood, desired, despite being completely broken inside.
"That's alright; take your time," she murmured. "We can take this at your pace."
Chapter thirty-eight
Alexander
Charlotte looked physically ill when she emerged from Dr. Stonebrook's office. Her peachy skin had gone pale, and her eyes were red, as if she'd been crying.
"How did it go?" My stomach churned with worry as she opened the car door.
"That was awful" she replied, sniffling and wiping her nose on the back of her hand. I guessed as much. My first session with Dr. Stonebrook had been spent in utter silence. By the time our second session had ended, I was in tears, just as Charlotte was.
"You don't have to go back again, if you hate it that much—"
"I have an appointment next Friday," Charlotte replied, looking at me like I was some kind of lunatic for suggesting such a thing. I couldn't hold in the chuckle of disbelief. She hated it, but she was willing to go back. Something good must have come from it.
"Well, that's good," I told her.
"She said she wants to see you again too," Charlotte added, pulling out an appointment card and handing it to me.
"Fuck…"
"Why didn't you tell me?" Charlotte asked as I pulled away from the curb.
"About the suicide attempt?" I asked, keeping my eyes on the road. My grip tightened on the wheel. My sessions with Dr. Stonebrook had helped, but I didn't enjoy reminiscing about that time of my life.
"Yes."
I shrugged, not entirely knowing the answer myself. "It's not really something to bring up in everyday conversation. It was a long time ago."
"Does she know?" Charlie asked. I glanced at her in confusion.
