Page 32 of When She Loved Me
“Can’t hear that from here,” Franklin said matter-of-factly, which had Nicole biting her lip in consternation.
She watched Trevor, aware, as others might not have been, of his jaw clenching, rather tightly. He’d changed out of his damp clothes, obviously without assistance—if he’d wanted that, he should have traveled with his valet, she thought uncharitably—but was dressed similarly as he had been, only now wore dry breeches and shirt and a different pair of Hessians.
But he only said, with some forced calmness, “Might I have some time with my wife while you recall some chore you should be about?”
And now they understood, and as one, they rose and exited the library, Franklin having to wake Abby as she had, as she normally did during tea time, dozed off.
Nicole unfolded her legs, placing her feet on the floor. She’d just known he would take exception to their tea time gathering, and she said as much to him when the door closed behind Ian, the last to exit.
Chapter Eleven
TREVOR THOUGHT SHEshould be thankful that he’d not roared and railed at them for their unprecedented, unacceptable, and wholly improper conduct. Perhaps it was only his near complete shock that had held his tongue to the brief and unsatisfying rebuke he’d given.
“Nicole, you will not—”
“Don’t you dare tell me what I can and cannot do.” She’d jumped up from the window seat, her eyes blazing. “It’s tea and they are my—”
“They are not your family! They are the servants!”
“They are my friends.”
This circumstance, too, was of his doing, he supposed. Good God! How was he ever to turn this around?Begin as you mean to proceed, his father had always taught him. It would now be difficult indeed to train the servants to actually behave as servants, showing the proper deference for the lady of the manor when she was happy to invite them to tea! What was next—bringing them out with her to local dinner parties?
But how was he supposed to denounce the onlyfriendsshe claimed to have, as this situation was, essentially, his own fault? This, he decided with a sigh, was a challenge for some later date. Presently, he had far greater quandaries to address. He worked at lowering his voice and his temper.
“You asked me earlier why I had come now to the abbey.”
She surprised him by saying, not with rancor, but just a statement of fact, it seemed, “But then I decided that I really wasn’t interested in your reasons for coming.”
“Nicole, while there is much to appreciate in the very apparent growth you’ve made as a person over the past year, you would do well to discern the difference between speaking up for yourself in a mature fashion and simply being a brat.”
He watched her eyes widen to such a degree as to leave no question about her reception of his suggestion and held up his hand when she looked about to spew forth her very obvious thoughts on this.
“Apologies. That was uncalled for.”
She seethed, breathing through her nose, her little hands fisted at her sides.
“I’ve thought about coming to the abbey for quite some time.” He stepped forward, so that only a few feet separated them. “I know now that my actions upon our wedding day, and since, have been deplorable. I thought, perhaps I still believe, there was deceit and an attempt to entrap me into marriage. However, I believe the marriage can be saved yet.”
She looked still particularly amazed, but said, with quiet calm, “You’ve just admitted that you still believe I conspired against you but you’re willing to ‘save’ the marriage you threw away? Yes, well now I’m even more confused.”
“I am saying I am sorry for my actions.”
“It actually sounded like you are sorry for my supposed actions but being the kind and rational man that you are, you’re willing to give me a chance to beg forgiveness for something I didn’t do.”
Through near-gritted teeth, he said, “I’ve come to say let’s work on the marriage, and get through all these issues—”
“And I am saying that is all well and good, but I am still not much inclined to be married or have a relationship with a personwho can so cavalierly set aside his own wife—one who was quite obviously and so tremendously infatuated with him—on the mereassumptionof some slight against him.” When he would have spoken she added pointedly, her ire and volume increasing, “And maybe then—if therewerea true affront—maybe only a week might pass, and he would come to his senses. Perhaps it might be several weeks, if he were especially stubborn and clung to the notion that he’d been so abused. But I wonder, what kind of man allows his wife to wallow in this imposed exile for nigh on a year? And furthermore, expects her to so gladly leap into his arms, without so much affection toward her own dignity that it be banished simply by his maddening arrival and questionable intent?”
“This is about your dignity? Your pride? While I’m the one who came back—”
She threw up her hands, in despair or disdain, he did not know.
“Listen toallthe words, my lord,” she said with some exasperation. “I wouldn’t even want to know a person who was cruel or cold or unforgiving—let alone be married to him.”
“You’re going to preach about forgiveness when you offer none?”
She sighed. “I forgive you, my lord—people make mistakes, myself more than most, perhaps. I just don’t want to know you.”
