Page 93 of The Forsaken
In his last letter, Guy had mentioned that he was quartered at Westminster Palace as part of Warwick’s personal guard. Kate supposed it was kind of the Earl of Stanwyck to provide Guy with an opportunity to serve Warwick, but she wished he’d ordered him back home instead. Hugh missed Guy dreadfully, and took out his frustration and guilt at driving his brother away on Kate. He barely spoke to her these days and chose to spend the long evenings in conversation with Eleanor or playing chess with Adam, who took gleeful pride in beating Hugh nearly half the time. Hugh smiled indulgently and told Adam that he’d allowed him to win, but they both knew the truth and enjoyed the battle of wits.
Sadly, Adam would be leaving them in a few months, going to Stanwyck Hall to begin his term as page to the earl, and their family would shrink once more, leaving just the three of them in residence, a prospect Kate didn’t relish.
Eleanor had become openly coy and affectionate with Hugh. She touched him lightly on the arm, or sat closer than necessary, claiming she was cold and needed to be closer to the fire. Her obvious loneliness was her excuse for blatant flirting. Hugh, in turn, was chivalrous and solicitous, treating Eleanor with the kind of respect he no longer bestowed on his wife. The two of them made Kate feel humiliated and ostracized, and whether their conduct was intentional or simply the result of their forced closeness, Kate often wished she could just disappear and leave them to it. There had been a time when death seemed like a terrifying and cruel punishment, if it came too early, but lately, in Kate’s mind, it had taken on the qualities of a kind stranger who might take her away to a place where she’d no longer be unhappy or unwanted. She’d slip out of her skin and escape the hollow shell she had become—an abused wife, an unloved daughter, and an unfulfilled woman who had never become a mother, and be reborn in a place that promised eternal salvation and the everlasting love of God. Perhaps God would take her soon, if she were lucky.
Kate finally forced herself to stir. It was fully light outside and high time she started on the day’s chores. With Aileen gone and Joan getting on in years, there was more for her to do, andEleanor never bothered to lend a hand with cooking, baking, or laundry. Kate’s wrist hurt and had begun to swell and her hip throbbed where she’d landed on it, but she ignored the pain. She washed out the sheet, then limped down the stairs and toward the kitchen where she could hang it by the fire to dry.
Joan stopped kneading the dough when Kate walked in, her eyebrows lifting in surprise and her lips pursing. Kate realized she must have red-rimmed eyes and a pink nose from crying. She pretended not to notice Joan’s questioning stare and smiled politely in greeting. She didn’t need Joan’s pity. She just wanted to get on with her day as if nothing had happened.
“Sit yerself down and have some breakfast,” Joan said as she brushed flour off her hands. “Hugh’s already eaten. He’s outside chopping wood, the poor lad. ’Tis cold out there, and it snowed during the night. It takes some doing to get Hugh out of bed this early in the morning. Might he be angry about something?” she mused as she studied Kate’s impassive face, her eyes straying to the wet sheet steaming by the hearth.
Kate accepted a cup of hot broth and a slice of bread and applied herself to her breakfast. She wasn’t about to take the bait.
“Adam’s excited about Christmas,” Joan went on. “Hugh promised him a dagger this year, and a sword by the time he turns fourteen.”
“What does an eight-year-old need with a dagger?” Kate asked.
“’Tis not about need, but about rite of passage. Adam will be going to Stanwyck Hall come spring, and it’ll look good in front of the other lads if he has something of value, especially if it’s a weapon.”
“I’ll miss him,” Kate said truthfully.
“Aye, so will I, but ’tis the right time. Jed will be leaving us as well.”
“What? Why?”
“William promised him a parcel of land when he came of age and Hugh means to honor that promise. Jed needs to learn to farm it, so he’ll go live with one of the families on the estate. They can use the help, and Jed will get an education. And then he’ll be ready to wed.”
“How will Alf manage without Jed?” Kate asked. Walter did much to help the old man, but if Stanwyck called Hugh to arms, Walter would go with him, and Alf would be left to manage on his own.
“Oh, I expect Hugh will bring in a new lad.”
“He should find someone to help you as well. It’s been nearly a year since Aileen died.”
“He’s offered. I’m just not ready to train another lass, I suppose. Too much bother, if ye ask me. If they’re too young, they can’t handle much in the way of housework, and if they’re a bit older, they only have eyes for the lads and want a home and hearth of their own. I thought Aileen might stay a while, being damaged and all, but even those who’re deaf and dumb can’t keep their legs crossed.”
Kate bristled at Joan’s spiteful comment but said nothing. There was little point. She finished her meal and rose laboriously to her feet. She had mending to do and wanted to take advantage of the bright morning light. Though she still saw well at a distance, she could no longer sew or embroider by candlelight. She dared not say anything to Hugh about her failing eyesight for fear of appearing even more useless than he already believed her to be.
Kate had been at her mending for nearly two hours when she heard the frenzied barking of the dogs. She glanced out the window to see what all the fuss was about. A lone rider came trotting through the gate, his face endearingly familiar, even from a distance.
Guy.Kate dropped the shirt she’d been working on and sprang to her feet. Her hip hurt even more after sitting for a prolonged period of time, but she had to welcome Guy home.
She heard Hugh’s booming voice. “Nurse, you’d best prepare something grand for supper tonight. Our lad’s come home!” Whatever animosity he’d felt toward Guy had been replaced by relief at seeing his brother home and unharmed.
Eleanor, who’d been working on the same piece of embroidery for the past two weeks, made no move to rise, but her eyes never left Kate’s face, watching with interest as Kate tried to hide her joy and rearrange her features into a semblance of bland indifference. “You must be glad Guy’s home. He will keep Hugh sufficiently distracted to give you some respite.”
Kate wasn’t sure what Eleanor was implying but decided not to ask for clarification. Eleanor was probably just trying to get a rise out of her.
Kate limped from the room and stepped out into the snow-covered yard. Hugh was already there, clapping Guy on the shoulder and calling to Alf to see to Guy’s horse. Adam stood just behind Hugh, suddenly shy of his uncle, his eyes alight with excitement and curiosity.
“Adam, Jesu, you’ve grown. I hardly recognized you. I’m glad I came home before you left us for good. When’s that to be, then?”
“Just after Easter, Uncle Guy. I’m to enter the Earl of Stanwyck’s service.”
“I envy you. Some of the happiest years of my life were when I was a page. The earl has several boys in his service at a time, so you’ll make friends and learn sword fighting and jousting.”
“Uncle Hugh’s been teaching me.”
“He’s a quick study,” Hugh said, placing his hand on Adam’s shoulder and smiling down at the boy. “He really makes me work. My reflexes are not what they used to be.”
