Page 109 of The Forsaken
Kate shook her head. “No, not cheese.”
“All right. I’ll have some roast fowl for ye for dinner. Can ye stomach that?”
“I think so.” Roasted fowl actually sounded appealing at the moment. She needed to eat something besides soggy bread. Joan was right; she was starved for solid food. She’d sell her soul for an apple, but there wouldn’t be fresh apples until the autumn. Some jelly perhaps. She craved something sweet desperately.
“All right then, I’ll see to it. Ask Eleanor to join ye for a walk. Ye shouldn’t be traipsing about alone in yer condition.”
Kate shook her head. She couldn’t think of anything she desired less. After countless hours spent in each other’s company, the two women had never developed a bond, and Kate frequently wondered if Eleanor even liked her. Kate hadn’t left her bed since Joan heralded news of her pregnancy, and she wasn’t looking forward to seeing the simmering resentment in Eleanor’s eyes. As long as Kate failed to conceive, Eleanor could pity her and feel less disgruntled about her own situation, but now that Kate was pregnant, even that little bit of comfort would be denied her sister-in-law.
Kate finished her breakfast, donned her cloak, and stepped outside. The sky was a cloudless blue, and the trees were decked out in luscious shades of green, their branches bursting with life after months of wintery slumber. The river flowed in the distance, a speckled band of silver and gold that hugged the curve of the castle mound. Kate took a deep breath and set off toward the woods, lured by birdsong and the smell of pine resin. She felt well for the first time in weeks, and the realization added a spring to her step.
She rested her splayed hand on her belly. There, beneath her palm, she felt a tiny bump. It was invisible beneath the folds of her skirt, but it was there, testament to the life growing inside. Kate had no way of knowing exactly when she’d fallen pregnant, but if it happened on Christmas, the baby would come in late September. Joan had said that expectant women felt movement midway through the pregnancy. She was almost there, so perhaps soon, she’d feel signs of life.
Kate caught her breath in wonder. Over the past few years, time had lost its meaning. She’d had nothing to wait for, nothing to look forward to. But now, time was everything. She’d bided her time until Hugh fell asleep so she could go to Guy, and with every passing day she was closer to holding her baby in her arms. She would not give in to despair. Guy would keep their secret, for her sake, and for the sake of their child. He loved her. He wouldn’t do anything to harm either of them.
Kate had been walking for about twenty minutes when she heard footsteps on the path behind her. The footsteps weren’t stealthy; they sounded brisk, as if the walker were in a hurry. Kate peered in the direction she’d come, but trees obscured the section of the narrow path beyond the bend. She wasn’t frightened. This was de Rosel land, so the passerby could only be a peasant, which was just fine as long as he wasn’t a poacher.
Kate smiled when Guy appeared round the bend. His color was high and his eyes glinted with irritation as he approached her. “You could have told me,” he began without preamble. “I had to hear it from Hugh, who is pleased as punch that you’re finally breeding.”
“Guy, I…”
“Is it mine?” Guy demanded, his eyes pinning her with their intensity. “Is the child mine?”
“Yes, it is.”
“How can you be sure?”
“I’m sure because Hugh hasn’t touched me since before Christmas. You’d know that if you ever asked.”
Guy’s face softened and he reached out and took Kate gently by the arms. “I couldn’t, Kate. I couldn’t bear the thought of him inside you, but I could hardly demand that you deny your husband. I had no right,” he explained. He was making excuses, but Kate saw the leap of excitement in his eyes.
“Are you pleased?”
“Of course I’m pleased.” Guy lowered his hands to her belly and cupped her tiny stomach. “How could I not have known?”
“It’s wondrous,” Kate breathed, putting her hands over his. “We’ll finally be a family.”
Guy’s gaze slid away from hers, as he shook his head in disbelief. “Am I meant to just step aside and watch you live happily ever after with my brother?”
“Guy, Hugh is my husband. What would you have me do? I must protect this child, above all else. I will not have it disgraced before it’s even born.”
Guy took hold of Kate’s hands, squeezing her fingers painfully in his agitation. “Kate, I want us to be a family. I want the chance to raise my child.”
“That’s impossible, and you know it.”
“Nothing is impossible.”
Kate snatched her hands out of Guy’s grasp and took a step back. “Guy, the only way we can be together is if Hugh dies, and I won’t wish that on him. Not ever.”
“What, so you love him now? Did you lie with me just to get with child? And now that you have what you wished for, you’ll just discard me?” Guy exclaimed. He looked like his whole world had just come crashing down, his eyes wide with shock and his hands trembling at his sides.
Kate reached up and cupped his cheek, smiling into his eyes. “Guy,” she said softly, “it’s you I love. It’s always been you.”
Her words worked their magic and Guy drew her to him, resting his chin on top of her head. “I can’t bear it, Kate. I can’t bear knowing I can never be with you or play a part in my child’s life. I will always be Uncle Guy, never ‘Father’.”
“Guy, there’s nothing we can do to change that.”
“Iwillchange it. I promise you, Kate. We will be a family—soon.”
