Page 69 of Chasing After You
Owen isn’t here to step in and keep Bash from killing me, but I’m hoping after what I heard in the car, murder isn’t a possibility.
My hands are embarrassingly sweaty, and I wipe them on my pants as we step out onto the wraparound deck, overlooking the ocean. The salt air immediately hits me, and it feels like I’m home.
There’s a reason my tattoo sleeve is centered around Poseidon and the ocean. I look out at the water, hearing the waves crash, and I understand that the only predictable thing is how unpredictable it can be. Maybe that’s part of what draws me to Mirabelle.
She reminds me of the ocean with her natural beauty and unpredictability. I’d happily drown in her waves any day.
“I was wrong. I’m sorry,” Sebastian starts, leaning on the railing. His shoulders sink as he glances at me, and I can tell he means it. For the first time ever, I don’t see him as this legendary player I’ve been trying to live up to. I see Sebastian as another person who knows what it feels like to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders.
“Thank you,” I say, taking the spot next to him.
“If you say nothing happened when she was . . .a minor,” he struggles to say it, and I don’t dare interrupt. He looks back out over the water. “Then I believe you. I know I said a lot of things in the heat of the moment that I didn’t mean, but this is hard for me to understand, Henry. I’m trying to, but I’m also being honest with you, and I’m asking you to give me the same respect.”
God, I want to be honest. I should admit everything is fake between us, but even thinking that feels like another lie. I’m not sure what it is, but it’s not fake.
“That’s fair,” I agree, following his gaze to the cluster of clouds brewing in the distance over the water.
“You’re older than her, and it worries me. I know what kind of man you are and that she’s an adult, but Mirabelle’s my baby girl. I can’t help wondering how many times I’ve left the two of you alone unsupervised over the years. It caught me off guard, and truthfully? I was hurt you didn’t come to me yourself. That day at the field, I was out of line. I was on edge after the fire the night before, and then to learn from a press release that you and Mira were together . . . I let my emotions get the best of me.”
“Bash, I swear to you, nothing has ever happened between us until after the Super Bowl. I’m sorry I didn’t come to you first. I never intended to hurt anyone, but especially not you and Thalia. It all happened so quickly, and we were still trying to figure everything out when the pictures from the fire were posted.”
Sebastian absently taps his fingers on the railing as he inhales deeply. “Thank you for saying that. An apology doesn’t excuse what I said, bu—”
“You were saying them out of love for Mirabelle. I get it. It’s okay.” I have never felt more guilty than I do in this moment.
“Thank you for being there for Mirabelle, in more ways than one, but especially today.”
“Of course. She means a lot to me.” I swallow the lump forming in my throat. He shouldn’t be thanking me.
“I’m glad to hear that. She’s a force to be reckoned with, but that doesn’t mean she isn’t breakable. Be careful with her love and trust, Mira doesn’t give it easily. She’s exactly like her mother in that regard, and if you care about Mirabelle like I think you do, don’t let her be an almost in your life. You’ll spend the rest of your life regretting it,” he warns, knowingly. I feel like there’s more to that than he’s saying, but I’m not sure it’s my place to ask. “I don’t want to dwell on this anymore than we have to, so if you’re willing, can we move past this?” Sebastian asks, and I nod, but his face doesn’t relax. In fact, the tension radiating from him puts me on edge, and I thought we were supposed to be past the hard part of the conversation. “I need to ask you about something, and I need you to be honest with me. It’s important.”
Oh fuck, he knows. He knows the Panthers were going to trade me. All of this was for nothing. “Okay,” I say, tightening my hands into fists to hide the shaking of how anxious this makes me. I don’t want to disappoint him.
“Are you in contact with your biological mother?” he asks, and I’m not sure how Sebastian knows about the phone calls, but I’m so fucking relieved he doesn’t know about my contract that I don’t even care.
“I wouldn’t call it being in contact. She calls once or twice a week, usually from a new number after I decline enough times, but I never answer. I did a couple of times a few years ago, but all she wanted was money, so I’ve been avoiding her calls since then. I tried changing my number a few times, but it doesn’t matter. She keeps finding it, and it’s not worth the hassle of changing my number every time.”
“So you haven’t seen her in person?”
I shake my head, failing to understand why this is so important. “No. I haven’t seen her since I was a kid, but why are you asking?”
He scratches the back of his neck, and I have a bad feeling I’m missing some crucial piece of information here. “Don’t worry about it, but if she continues calling, will you forward the numbers to me?”
What? What does she have to do with Sebastian? Do I even want to know?The questions linger on the tip of my tongue as he pats me on the back.
“You’re playing well this season. Keep it up, and you might have a shot at a postseason run your first year starting.” Sebastian smiles at me, and it’s a refreshing change of pace from the hard looks I’ve been on the receiving end of for the last month and a half.
“You think?” I ask, accepting the change in conversation as the wind picks up.
“I do. I haven’t missed a game. You held your own in Georgia when a lot of people would have let that crowd get to them,” he says, and that means the fucking world to me. “How much is Owen fining you for missing today?”
“Seventeen grand,” I admit, but there wasn’t a shot in hell I was letting Mirabelle deal with today by herself. Owen told me his hands were tied because it would look like favoritism if he didn’t.
He laughs, shaking his head. “He took it easy on you. Send me the invoice, I’ll take care of it. My kid’s the reason you left, so the least I can do is take care of it.”
“Actually, I’d like to pay it myself. It was my choice to leave today, knowing I’d be fined. I wanted to be there for Mira.”
Sebastian studies me for a moment, his face softening. “We should get back inside. There’s a storm coming, and I think I have a kid to ground for life,” he says, and the clouds look a lot closer than they did a few minutes ago.
