Page 84 of Knot Gonna Lie
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
ELARA
The nest room breathed with the rhythm of sleeping bodies—Luca’s tropical storm, Seth’s bright citrus, Jaxom’s stormy cedar, weaving into something new. My pack. The word still felt foreign, yet their scents had already tattooed themselves into my skin. As much mine as I was theirs.
Sleep eluded me.
I slipped from the tangle of limbs, careful not to wake them. Luca’s arm tightened reflexively around air before easing again. Seth murmured something incomprehensible in his sleep. Jaxom’s hand searched blindly across the sheets, curling into the warmth I’d left behind.
The corridors whispered with recycled air, the hum of distant engines. My bare feet made no sound against the cold floor. I wasn’t running—just seeking. Something unfinished scratched at the edges of my consciousness like a splinter working its way deeper.
Xavier.
The observation lounge door stood open, amber light spilling across the hall. He sat silhouetted against the stars, a mug steaming between his hands. His reflection in the viewport tracked my approach—winter given form, beautiful and remote as distant nebulae.
“Couldn’t sleep either?” His voice carried no surprise, only weary acknowledgment.
I settled into the chair across from him, tucking my legs beneath me. The leather creaked, still warm from someone else’s presence. “The nest feels off still.”
His laugh came bitter as burnt coffee. “I’m not pack material, Elara. Surely you’ve realized that by now.”
“That’s not what I meant.” The truth sat heavy between us, unspoken but understood. His scent—crisp mountain snow and steel—stirred nothing in my omega instincts. No pull, no hunger, no recognition. Just... absence. “But we need to talk.”
“About my behavior during game night?” He took a long sip, eyes averted my gaze. “I suppose I owe you an apology.”
“You owe me honesty.”
His fingers tightened around the ceramic. Through the viewport, a distant star collapsed into itself, beautiful in its destruction. “You want honesty? Fine. Your scent is wrong to me. Not repulsive—that would be easier. Just… nothing. My biology doesn’t recognize you as anything beyond another person sharing air. Two members of the same clan.”
The admission should have stung. Instead, relief eased through me. “And mine doesn’t recognize you.”
“Yet you’ve claimed three of my clan brothers in as many days.” No accusation colored his tone, only observation. “They follow you now like planets orbiting a new sun, their entire gravity shifted. Even those you haven’t marked watch you with a wonder I’ve never seen before.”
“Is that what frightens you? Change?”
“What frightens me is Eli.” The name hit like a stone in still water. “Luca’s brother won’t understand this. He won’t accept it. Their empire—two alphas building something impossible together—depends on trust. And now?” He gestured at me. “Now Luca has you. A secret omega. A pack forming without Eli’s consent.”
“Luca will tell him the truth—”
“Will he? When? After your heat when the bonds are irreversible? After you’re carrying his children?” Xavier’s gaze finally met mine, sharp as steel. “Eli isn’t just his brother or business partner. He’s the other half of an empire built on trust. When that shatters—and it will—Coco Pharma burns. Our medical supplies that keep three systems’ populations stable? Gone. The research that might finally crack the much needed hope for our dying species? Destroyed.”
The weight of his truth pressed against my lungs. I’d been so focused on my pack, my needs, my escape from the Matron’s protective cage that I hadn’t considered the larger implications. “You think I’ll destroy humanity’s future.”
“I think you’re a catalyst,” he corrected. “Neither good nor evil, just... inevitable. Like stellar drift or molecular decay. You arrived, and everything began unraveling. Not through malice, but through nature itself.”
“I never asked for this.”
“No. But you embraced it.” He set his mug aside, deliberate.. “During game night, watching everyone respond to you... I saw our clan’s destruction written in their eager faces. The careful balance we’d maintained, the professional boundaries that kept us functional—obliterated in mere days. By your presence… if those who aren’t in your pack.”
“They were dying, Xavier. Slowly. Quietly.” Jaxom’s words echoed in me, resonant and true. “When did you last see Luca happy? When did Seth stop hiding behind data and research?When did Jaxom start believing he deserved to stop drowning in the guilt over his sister?”
“Happiness and functionality aren’t synonymous.”
“No. But one without the other is just another form of imprisonment.” I leaned forward, willing him to understand. “I’m not trying to destroy your clan. I’m trying to build something that includes it. A pack within a clan, boundaries respected, everyone given choice.”
“And if I choose isolation?”
“Then I respect that.” The words came easier than expected. “I don’t need you to want me, Xavier. I don’t even need you to like me. But we need to coexist on this ship, especially with Planet Tera approaching.”
