Page 79 of When We Were More
Oh, shit.
“Even if only one of them can, we can lift the heavy?—”
“No worries. It’s covered. But it’s a good idea to connect with your brothers and see if they want to hang out. Possibly get dinner while Heath is still home?” My voice is high-pitched, and my words rushed. I’m nervous, which explains why I’m being so damn awkward.
Henry stills and tilts his head to the side. His deep green eyes are laser focused right on me.
“What do you mean you’ve got it covered? Did you hire a moving company?”
A need to pull away comes over me, and I take a few steps toward the living room.
“C’mon, we can talk in there. Our coffee’s getting cold.”
Once there, I grab a mug and sit on the couch, pull my legs up under me, and face him.
“Who is moving you, Matilda?” He sits at the edge of the couch. Not touching his coffee.
“Shannon’s husband and a few of his work friends. They’re willing to work for pizza and beer afterward, so cheap labor.” My attempt at humor falls flat.
“Why didn’t you ask me?” I close my eyes and sigh. It apparently irks him. “I guess why would you, when you can have a bunch of firefighters helping you? Is that it?” He stands. “I shouldgo.”
My God, what is his problem? It’s not a big deal.
“You’re being petulant.” I climb off the couch and set my coffee down.
“Tell me why you didn’t ask me.” His words are clipped.
“Henry, what does it matter? It’s not?—”
“Why. Didn’t. You?—”
“Because I’m not your responsibility! I’m not your girlfriend. I’m not yours to take care of. You don’t get to control me, and you don’t need to know everything about me.” I’m dangerously close to crying out of frustration, and that makes me even angrier. “Yeah, we’re friends, but otherwise I’m just a guaranteed?—”
“Stop.” His voice is commanding. “Don’t fucking say it, Matilda.”
“Why? It’s true.”
“No, it fucking isn’t.” He takes a step toward me, and I take a step back. His face falls, and the anger melts away. “Matilda…” His words are softer now.
Why is he suddenly treating me with kid gloves, like a cornered animal?
“We had a deal, and we shouldn’t forget it. Last night was a perfect example of what happens when we aren’t careful with our boundaries. We’re friends with benefits, and our rules are there to protect us. If that isn’t working for you anymore, we should stop.”
My hands shake, and my heart pounds against my chest wall. I walk around the coffee table. What a hypocrite I am. Imadethe rule that if feelings get involved, we stop. My reaction last night could only be from having developed feelings for him, yet I haven’t stopped things. I’m telling myself that as long as he keeps the rule, we’ll be okay. We can continue…
“Why?” The corners of his mouth dip into a frown. “Why couldn’t we talk about it? If things changed, I mean.”
What does that mean? My heart races, and I’m suddenly lightheaded. I can’t let myself get sucked in by another man who can hurt me. I’ve proven I turn into a people pleasing, submissive-to-my-own-detriment type of woman when I let myself feel too much for a man. This discussion is heading into dangerous territory.
“You’ve got to go, Henry. You’ll be late.”
Henry grabs his phone off the table, taps it a few times, then lifts it to his ear. I hear the familiar nasally voice that belongs to Lucy.
“Lucy, it’s Henry. Call McAlister back and tell him I’m not coming.”
My breath catches as he listens for a second to whatever Lucy is saying. What is he doing? He can’t do that.
“Henry,” I whisper-yell. He glances up at me and holds eye contact.
