Page 132 of Mr. Picture Perfect
It’s true. When Dean and Anthony finally emerged for their auctions—poor Anthony with his nose bandaged so tightly to keep it from bleeding, you’d think he was wearing a diaper on his face—a bidding war began that put mine to shame. Five women fought for Dean, and the bids grew so large that even Frankie looked like he might need assistance. One by one they dropped, until the war at last concluded with a bid of $7,500 by none other than Candace. Apparently, she is a CEO of some Austin-based food company and just happened to visit the Spruce area on a whim, having caught wind of the upcoming bachelor pageant. Their chance meeting at that coffee shop and the seven minutes of conversation that they shared must have been an act of fate, bringing the two together.
And so it seems that Dean King has found his Queen.
Anthony’s auction was considerably less lucrative. At first, the bids rolled in at a sleepy snail’s pace. It seemed like Frankie was a second away from jokingly placing a bid himself just to nudge the ball in the right direction when suddenly the floral-shirt guy came back into the picture with a bid, stunning the women. Anthony, who at this point had lost all hope and commitment to the entire ordeal, simply shrugged and said, “Sure, fine, whatever, whoever can bid on me, I don’t care.” And suddenly men and women began throwing in their bids while Anthony, only half paying attention, kept touching his bandage and wincing in pain. His auction soon concluded with a comparatively modest bid of $1,075 from a lady in the second row.
That lovely lady isn’t here. Anthony, last I heard, crashed on the guest lounge sofa from exhaustion—and also likely from being tired of everyone’s consolation and insistence that his whole night “totally didn’t go allthatbadly”. He likely just wishes all memory of it would wash away as quickly as humanly possible.
Other than Anthony, everyone else seems to be having a great time tonight. Cissy and Nadine keep cracking each other up in the living room, kicked back on the sofa with their heels off, downing a bottle of wine and irredeemably intoxicated. Dean and Candace are seated at a tea table by the back window overlooking a garden, getting to know one another better. Tyrone and Omar mingle with the other couples in attendance, including local fashion designer Lance Goodwin with his long-time boyfriend Chad, as well as my recently-wed bosses Jimmy and Bobby. I’m not sure where Tanner and Billy are, but Jimmy assures me they probably just had to head back home to their kids, who didn’t come to the event, as it “likely would have bored them twice to death”. Mindy and Joel similarly had to duck out early to relieve “whomever was lucky enough to babysit the little monsters”.
Our parents stand at opposite ends of the room, mingling with completely different people. Only my Nan is separated from them all, sipping a flute of champagne and slowly dancing to a song that plays from a nearby radio, completely in her own world. I guess it was too much to hope for our mothers to reconcile tonight.
It’s nearing midnight when Noah and I raid the snack bar near the kitchen, realizing we’d barely eaten a thing all night.
And Noah still hasn’t let it go. “You’re not paying me back.”
I snatch a carrot stick from his fingers, startling him, and pop it in my mouth. “I most certainly amnotmaking you give up all that money you’ve saved up, Noah Lawrence Reed, just to take me out on adate… which you could do for free.”
“You just took my carrot stick.”
“It’s why I let the auction carry on at all. I told myself, ‘well, he can go and be my cute little hero tonight, but he’s not letting go of acentof that money.’ And I mean it.”
“But if I didn’t step in, then you would be going on a date with Mae’sgorgeousbrother.”
“Is that who that was?” I ask innocently, playing dumb, as I go for another carrot stick. “Didn’t even notice.”
Now it’s Noah who snatches the stick out ofmyfingers. “And if it cost me $3,000 to keep you from dating some pouty, gorgeous guy with a short temper …”
“You’ve called him gorgeous twice now.”
“… then it’s worth every dollar.” He bites the carrot stick in half, narrowing his eyes challengingly at me.
That’s precisely when TJ finds us, strutting up to help himself to a slice of cucumber. “Actually,” he says, “it wasn’t your money you were bidding with … butmine.”
Noah and I turn to him, confused.
TJ pops the slice into his mouth, crunches on it, then smiles. “You were using my paddle, remember? It’s attached to a bidding ID—mine—which means it’smy$3,000 that saved Cole.”
Noah seems unsure what to say for a moment. “I … T-TJ, I … I didn’t think I was—”
“It was all part of the plan,” he says. “I knew what I was doing when I handed you my paddle. And since my ID is connected to my own account, I guess you can look at it as … a $3,000 donation I just made to the cause in y’all’s honor.”
“But you don’t make an awful lot working T&S’s Shoppe part-time,” argues Noah, “certainly not enough to afford—”
“Oh, that job’s for pocket change, and honestly, I love working there helping out Billy. And besides, you know who my parents are, right?” He chuckles. “They give me agenerousallowance I sure don’t need while I’m in college. I hardly even use it. So, if it helps, just see this as a donation fromthem.” TJ grins as he helps himself to another slice of cucumber, pops it in his mouth with playful finesse, then peers at Noah. “Also, that special date you two will be going on sometime soon? It’s covered by the event, too. It includes a pair of coupons to aspecialrestaurant for whatever your heart desires on the menu, no limits.” He lets out a happy sigh. “Ah … I can’t wait to hear how it goes. I’ve been kinda rooting for you for a while now.” He pats us both on the back. “No, don’t thank me. Just take pics of the food. Good pics. Total food porn, that’s all I want in return. Yeah, that’ll suffice.”
With that, TJ saunters away, leaving a bewildered me and a teary-eyed Noah speechless with carrot sticks in our hands.
Noah peers off over my shoulder, squinting at something. “Is it just me, or are Tamika and Frankie … like, really flirty?”
I follow his line of sight. Tamika and Frankie are hanging by one of the tall windows, nearly tucked into the drapery with a tiny plate of crackers and cheese between them. Frankie has a cute and teasing smile on his face as he talks to Tamika, who herself seems amused and playful right back, as she puts a tiny block of cheese on a cracker and eats it. Even the way she chews is flirty, doing everything but batting eyelashes at him.
I shrug. “Didn’t they do theatre together back in school?”
“Everyone in school denied they were a thing.” Noah frowns. “But if they were a thing, Tamika would tell me, wouldn’t she?” He seems to experience a sudden doubt. “Uh … wouldn’t she …?” He shakes his head of the subject. “Anyway, I guess TJ just settled our dispute.” He faces me. “TJ’s the real person who bid on a date with you. You are about to go on a fancy date with TJ McPherson.”
I laugh at that, then pull Noah against me. “Is that your idea of a joke? Are you making an attempt at humor again?”
“Nope. Totally seriously serious. TJ just bought you.”
