Page 152 of Tales of a Deadly Devotion
I’d never discussed it with Kat. Didn’t need to. She always knew everything anyway. Instead, I’d found tonic tucked in my skirt pockets and a warm tub of water afterwards. She’d always find somewhere else to be, even if it was to be berated by a master or one of the librarians. As if knowing I’d want time alone. To put myself back together.
Thean’s lips pursed and I couldn’t determine if they were displeased by the revelation or unbothered.
‘You’ve had a lover?’ I hated the strange bite of interest in my voice. Unable to let this small thread go. Distracting me momentarily from my hunt. Not fully understanding why I’d want to know. Why something vicious curled in my gut that felt abominably like jealousy.
A short laugh left Thean’s lips, their smile tight as if pained by it. ‘Nobody is foolish enough to loveme, darling.’
Emmaline did.Only I didn’t say the words. Understanding that the voyav was bound to the Blackthorn house out of loyalty. A loyalty I understood without confirmation.
They’d loved Emmaline in their own way. Loved her enough to keep their promises. Blood oath or not. Just as I loved Kat, even if my secrets would be dangerous to her.
‘She wouldn’t let them.’ Thean let the words slip out so softly they were almost lost in another screech of laughter from a passing group of patrons.
I couldn’t miss the pain burrowed in those words. The small dismissiveness of them. Knowing they didn’t intend me to hear, or simply that they were too used to nobody listening.
My nose stung, strange emotion clogging my throat, confessions wanting to spill from my lips, but that was the little fool I had once been. The one who took her punishments too easily.
‘You should have helped, Kat,’ I admonished softly as I turned my attention back to the wretched room.
‘I thought it was clear by now, little nightmare.’ They brushed those words with the barest whisper of breath up the side of my throat. ‘I’m only interested in helping you.’
‘How lucky for me,’ I turned to look at them, how close they were. The warmth of them brushing down the length of my back. How desperately my beasts wished to arch back into it. To demand more.
Yet I knew where such a foolish hunger would lead.
Instead I focused on that horrid burning stench in my nose, so similar to the claw I’d cast into the kitchen fire. So similar as I slipped my hand into the voyav’s, pulling them along. Following that urge, hoping I could find something before we’d need to help Kat. Hoping she hadn’t got into any bother. The quicker we found something, the quicker we could leave.
The faint scent guided me until I reached a nondescript door, going for the knob only for it to remain stiff in my hand. Locked.
‘It’s here,’ I hissed, turning to find Thean contemplating the door. Reaching out to drag a finger along the frame. Something working in those sharp amber eyes. ‘How can two things be here at the same time?’
Was Kat on a wild goose chase? Had we found it first or was this something else?
‘The old mad bastard was a hoarder,’ they offered. ‘It’s warded against spells.’
‘I can change.’ It would be easy enough, but then those strange eyes darted to my own.
Thean’s eyes flashed, their grip tightening on my hand. ‘You’re not going in there naked.’
While I seethed at being told what to do, I also did not like the idea of being found naked in a room with no idea of what – or who – was in it … I relented.
‘Fine. You can,’ I offered sharply, resting my hands on my hips in frustration. ‘You can use my blood.’
Thean seemed to go tense at the suggestion but it was their own bastard fault for giving me commands.
A chatter of voices echoed down the dark hallway, coming towards us.
I grabbed their arm, pulling them with me into the alcove that led to a small office some fool had left open. It appeared there was nothing to steal but some tobacco and papers. I shut the door, turning the rusty lock. A large dusty window let moonlight fill the space.
Then I had a moment of panic, biting my lip as I looked down at my bracelet-covered wrists. Knowing the marks that lay beneath. The skin too damaged, and then there was my throat. Only that could be seen too.
‘Little nightmare,’ the voyav asked as if concerned I’d lost my mind. Maybe I had.
I pressed myself back against the desk and reached for my thin silk skirt, pulling it up. I’d drawn enough blood to know where was best as I revealed the smooth skin of my inner thigh.
‘Here,’ I commanded.
‘Alma—’ They almost seemed to choke on the word. Their eyes the most unguarded I’d ever seen them. As if I’d shocked them.
