Page 76 of One More Made Up Love Song
“I’m not worried about what people think. I’m worried about what Freddie thinks. I’m worried about him realizing I wasn’t faking.”
“You could just tell him,” she says gently. “Maybe he feels the same way.”
I scoff. “He does not feel the same way.”
“I’m sorry, were you out there just now—when he was kissing you like his life literally depended on it?”
“That was just a kiss. It’s not the same thing. I’ve worked for him for years, Laney. Years when he could have made a move, when he could have seen me differently. And he never has.”
She bites her lip like she’s considering, her arms wrapped around her middle. Then she lifts her shoulders in a gentle shrug. “Maybe something changed for him. It’s not always just about the person. It can also be about timing, about what someone is looking for, what they’re ready for.”
I take a deep breath, wanting to believe she’s right. But I don’t know how to let go of my fear, my desperation to keep my secret safe from Freddie.
Laney lets out a little chuckle. “You know, last year when Freddie showed up in Lawson Cove, Adam said he had a whole list of ‘normal person’ things he wanted to do. Go through a drive-thru. Shop for his own groceries. He even wanted to help clean the kennels out in the dog barn. Adam thought he was ridiculous, but I think sometimes we take for granted what it means to have that kind of freedom. There aren’t many places Freddie can go by himself. Not without compromising his safety.”
“Yeah. He hates complaining about his fame, but I’ve seen his frustration over the limitations it brings.”
She nods. “I also wonder if the fame has impacted how he approaches relationships. He was, what, sixteen when Midnight Rush took off?”
“Fifteen,” I say. “He was the youngest of the four.”
“Which means he’s probably never had a relationship where his fame wasn’t a factor.”
“Okay. But…what does that have to do with me?”
“Maybe nothing,” Laney says. “But it could mean he doesn’t really know what a normal relationship is supposed to look like. Or how to make a move without violating all kinds of rules about power dynamics and bosses hitting on their assistants.”
I shake my head. “There’s a power dynamic on paper, but it doesn’t feel like it in person. He treats me like an equal. I run his life, Laney. I know everything there is to know about him.”
“Okay. But that sounds like it couldalsomake things complicated when it comes to feelings.”
I turn and slump against the counter beside her. “Complicated is a good word.”
She’s quiet for a beat before she says, “I think you should still tell him how you feel.”
I’m shaking my head before she even finishes the sentence. “I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because he’s Freddie freaking Ridgefield.”
“Not to you, he’s not. He’s just Freddie.”
“But he isn’t,” I say. “His life, everything that comes with his fame. It’s a lot, Laney. I know it’s a lot because I’ve been watching him live it for years.”
“So what? You can handle a lot. Youhavebeen handling a lot because you’ve been living that life with him. You’re capable, practical, level-headed. That sounds like the perfect combination to handle a more serious relationship, despite the complications of his fame.”
“You’re making it sound way too easy.”
“Hi. Do you remember what I do for a living? A small-town veterinarian is probably the last person cut out to be the girlfriend of a former popstar. And now I’m engaged to one. We figured it out.”
“But Adam lives in your hometown. You have privacy, a life that isn’tjustabout his fame.”
She’s quiet for a long moment. “Yeah. I get that. It definitely matters. And we don’t have to deal with Freddie’s level of fame. But I still don’t think that’s a reasonnotto tell him how you feel. After everything you’ve seen about his life, you still feel the way you feel. That has to mean you’d be up for the challenge.”
“I can’t. At least not until after all this faking is behind us.”
“Why not?”
