Page 357 of How to Kiss a Hawthorne Brother
Flint:Hey. Just a heads up. Claire won’t stop talking about the two of us getting back together, and it’s becoming the THING people want to talk about instead of the actual movie we were in. My publicist suggested it might be good to give the impression I’m seeing someone else.
Brody:What does that even mean? How do you do that if you aren’t actually seeing someone?
Perry:Photoshop?
Flint:Not photoshop. I’m not that desperate.
I pull up the photo of Audrey and me and send it to my brothers.
Lennox:Dude. That’s a real woman in your arms. Care to explain?
Flint:It’s Audrey, and she’s in on it. She came over this afternoon and posed for a couple of photos.
Brody:Audrey agreed to pose as your girlfriend?
Flint:Is that really so hard to believe? She’s also attending the premiere with me in a few weeks.
Brody:Also as your girlfriend?
Flint:Fake girlfriend.
Unfortunately,I think to myself, but I’m not about to admit that to my brothers. It’s bad enough they’re all enjoying their happily married lives. They don’t need another reason to feel sorry for me.
Flint:I just need a buffer from Claire. If I go alone, she’ll corner me and force me into a compromising position.
Brody:And then, GASP, you’d have to marry her to save her reputation.
Lennox:Let me guess. Kate is making you watchBridgerton.
Perry:I watched it with Lila. Season two is better.
Flint:It’s MY reputation I’m worried about. And the director’s. She worked hard on this film, and Claire is hijacking everything.
Flint:We’re hoping if it’s obvious I’m with someone, she’ll lay off. And then the press can talk to us about the actual movie instead of my nonexistent love life.
Brody:Except, won’t they want to talk to you about your new mysterious girlfriend?
Flint:They’ll ask questions, sure. But I don’t have to answer. And Audrey isn’t a celebrity. They won’t care about her as much as they would if I were with Claire.
Lennox:I’m surprised the movie people aren’t making you and Claire pretend to be dating, seeing as how you fall in love in the actual movie. Isn’t that the kind of PR thing movie studios love?
Flint:If it were really happening, they might be willing to capitalize on it. But they wouldn’t make us pretend. That kind of thing only happens in books.
Perry:Says the guy who is literally taking a fake girlfriend to a movie premiere.
Flint:Shut up.
Lennox:I’m surprised Audrey agreed. How much did you have to offer her?
Perry:No. Please tell me you aren’t paying her.
Flint:I’m not paying her. I’m giving her access to my land so she can continue her research.
Brody:Wait. Is that a euphemism? Or…please tell me it isn’t a euphemism.
Flint:My actual LAND. It used to be owned by Carolina Southern. Apparently, there were all kinds of research things happening closer to the river.
Lennox:So you ARE paying her.
