Page 288 of How to Kiss a Hawthorne Brother
He stands up, shirt in hand. “Of course. Anything.” He pulls the shirt over his head.
I sigh over the loss of the view, but honestly, if we’re going to haveanykind of reasonable conversation tonight, it isn’t going to happen as long as Lennox is shirtless. “So, I have this box,” I say.
“Mysterious.”
Mysterious is an acceptable word, buthauntingfeels more fitting. It’s been sitting on my kitchen table for weeks, taunting me, almost like my mother herself is in the room and waiting for me to get over myself and open it already.
I’ve used work as an excuse. And Lennox as an excuse. And drama with Dad as an excuse. But I don’t want to put it off anymore. A part of me hopes that doing this one hard thing will make it easier for me to do another.
“My sister sent it last month, and I’ve been putting off going through it because it’s going to make me feel stuff.”
“Even more mysterious,” Lennox says.
“It’s full of my mom’s things.”
His eyes soften. “Ahh. Got it.”
“Bree mentioned some cooking utensils, some journals and recipe books. I think I’m ready to finally look through it, but I don’t really want to do it by myself.”
“Let’s do it together, then. Where is it? At your place?”
I nod. “If you come up, you can borrow my shower, then we can open the box?”
He props his hands on his hips. “Are you telling me a wardrobe change wasn’t enough? I still smell?”
I press my lips together to hide my smile. “So bad.”
He lunges forward and envelopes me in an enormous hug, squeezing me until I squeal and burst into laughter. I fake a gagging noise. “I’m dying, Lennox. Can’t. Breathe.”
“Fine, fine, you win,” he says, letting me go. “I’ll shower first. Then we can open the mystery box.”
He grabs his gym bag from the floor and follows me upstairs. He heads to the bathroom while I take Toby outside for a quick break, then I settle in the living room with the box at my feet. It’s still sealed shut with packing tape.
I rest my hands on the top and take a deep, cleansing breath. I can do this.
Iwantto do this.
A thought suddenly occurs to me.
I’ve been struggling with my definition of family, with my understanding of what it’s supposed to look like and feel like. But my mom is my family too. Maybe connecting with her will help me figure out what I’m supposed to do about Dad.
The water in the shower turns on, and I pull out my phone to text Bree while I wait for Lennox. I’ve done a decent job of keeping my sister in the loop regarding all the current parts of my life. She knows about Lennox, and she knows I’ve been putting off opening Mom’s box. But I haven’t told her about the network’s offer. That’s a secret I’m keeping on purpose because she wouldn’t understand why I’m even considering it.
But Bree doesn’t have the relationship with Dad that I do. She doesn’t feel the same kind of pressure, but she also hasn’t enjoyed the same kinds of perks. I can’t even get in my car without remembering the conversation Dad had with me when he gave me the keys for my twenty-eighth birthday. “We’ve worked for it, Tatum,” he said. “We deserve to treat ourselves.”
I remember feeling thrilled that he’d saidwehad worked for it. But I wonder, now, if it wasn’t just a way to make me feel beholden to the Christopher Elliott brand.
Tatum:I am about to commence going through the box.
Bree:You are BRAVE and you can do this.
Tatum:Lennox is with me. Or he will be momentarily. That’s going to make it easier, I think.
Bree:I love that. How are things between the two of you?
Tatum:Too good to be true. I know it’s early. That this thing has only just started. But when my mind wanders, it wandershere.I can’t stop imagining a life with him.
Bree:Then stay, honey. It’s obviously what you want.
