Page 74 of Absolutely Not in Love
Or, I don’t know. Sort of mine?
I guess we’re technically still just dating—we haven’t made anything official—but that feels like a minor technicality because we’re together every free moment we have.
“Hi,” he says as he leans down to kiss me hello. He tries to pull away after a tiny peck, but I hook a hand around his scarf and hold him close for something longer.Deeper.
He chuckles against my lips. “This is not the way to make me want to go hang out with your family.”
“It’s your fault. You’re the one who was standing here looking all delicious and perfect.”
He smirks and holds up a gift bag. “For Maddox.”
I pull the Appies hoodie out of the bag and hold it up, then let out a little gasp. “Felix, did the whole team sign this?”
“They did,” he says.
“Maddox is going to lose his mind.” I look up and meet his eyes. “Josh is going to lose his mind.My parentsare going to lose their minds, enough that they might steal Maddox’s sweatshirt and put it inside another shadowbox.”
“That’s quite a track record. Your entire family with their minds blown?” He presses me up against the wall, and I let out a little gasp. “What’s it going to take for you to lose your mind, Gracie?”
He kissesmethis time, long enough that I’m the one pushing back. “No! Stop it,” I tease. “You just said it yourself. We have to go to this party.”
He smirks and reaches toward his feet, picking up a second bag, this one just a regular one from the Appies merch store. “There’s a signed jersey in here for Josh, too. And one for each of your parents. I didn’t want them to feel left out, but I thought we might give them to them after the party so it doesn’t overshadow Maddox’s big day.”
My heart squeezes the tiniest bit. “Felix, you didn’t have to go to all this trouble.”
He shrugs. “It wasn’t any trouble. I see my teammates every day. I just threw a few things on the table in the locker room, put my goalie pads on, then blocked the door until they gave me what I wanted.”
“Right,” I say, though I can’t help but grin. “That doesn’t sound like any trouble at all.”
I stare at Felix for a long moment. Sometimes, I’m not even sure he’s real.
This morning for breakfast, I had homemade apple butter on my toast because yesterday, when Felix ran across the street to help Mrs. Dobson with her groceries, she gave him a jar to say thank you. When he replaced everything in my apartment, he used top-of-the-line materials and bought the very same mattress he has in his guest bedroom to replace my ruined one. He even replaced my stove, since one of the burners was acting up, and he wanted to make sure everything in my apartment worked perfectly. Then there’s the youth clinics with the hockey team and the way he’s constantly feeding his teammates and making everyone feel seen and welcome. All of it is amazing.Of courseit’s amazing. But it’s also a lot. And I don’t want Felix to think this level of going above and beyond is what I expect or need.
I love that he’s always taking care of people, but is he taking care of himself? Does he ever say no?
I take the bag of extra Appies jerseys and lean up to kiss him one more time. “This was really sweet of you, Felix.”
Together, we head down the stairs and to Felix’s car.
I’m glad he’s driving for two reasons. One, my car started making a very weird sound on my way home from school on Friday, and the less I drive it, the better I feel. And two, I’m a nervous wreck.
My parents know I’m coming to Maddox’s party, but they have no idea I’m bringing Felix. That alone will be shocking enough. But when they learn that we’re dating…I can’t even imagine what might happen.
Actually, that’s not true. I can perfectly imagine it. I just don’t want to. Because in their eyes, it will mean I’ve finally come back to the fold. They will treat me differently because now, I will have given them evidence that I’m one of them. That I don’t actually hate hockey after all.
I don’t love how much I want that feeling.
I also don’t love that I’ve never had it before just by being me.
“Turn left right up here,” I say to Felix as we approach Josh’s neighborhood. I point to a house with navy blue shutters and an Appies team flag hanging off the front porch. “That house right there is actually my parents’ house,” I say. “And this one here is Josh’s. The one with the balloons on the mailbox.”
“Have they always lived so close to each other?” Felix asks.
“Not always. Josh and Jadah moved in probably two, maybe three years ago?” I say. “They lived with Jadah’s parents before that, saving up money until they could afford their own place. When they moved in here, it made my mother ridiculously happy.”
Felix cuts the ignition, then reaches over and takes my hand, lifting it to his lips and pressing a quick kiss just above my knuckles. “I’m excited to meet everyone.”
Before I can respond, his gaze shifts, and he looks out the window behind me. “Looks like we’ve already been spotted.”
