Page 26 of Love Unexpected
I grimaced. “Oh, sure. Fine. Great. So, so great.”
She sank onto the sofa beside me. “I swear I would have warned you had I known he was going to be here,” she said. “It was Diedre. They were texting about something else, and the pizza came up and it just sort of happened. She didn’t even think about how it might make you uncomfortable.”
I shook my head. “It’s fine. You guys are friends. And you’ve been friends with him a lot longer than you have with me. I can’t expect you to choose between me and Isaac. That would be ridiculous.”
Jade eyed me warily. “You know, you could just tell him. Then this wouldn’t be a big deal. We could just all hang out together.”
I sighed. “If you had heard me five minutes ago, you wouldn’t have made that suggestion. I can’t do it, Jade. I’m literally the most ridiculous person on the planet whenever I’m within five feet of him.” I could almost hear Marley’s voice in my head, reminding me that if I would just visualize, channel my inner actress, I’d be fine. But that took a measure of mindfulness I couldn’t always claim. Sometimes, Isaac caught me off guard. What was I supposed to do then?
“But it won’t always be that way. If you just talk to him, remember how he makes you feel when you’re texting, you’ll eventually relax. What did your therapist always tell you about making situations that cause you anxietylessanxious?”
First Marley, now Jade? I shot her a look and she rolled her eyes. “It’s not my first time around the mental health block, sweetheart. Answer the question.”
I huffed. “She said I had to confront the situation instead of hide from it.”
“Right. If going to the store freaks you out? You gotta go to the store enough times tostopfreaking out. Normalize it. Visualize yourself having normal conversations. That’s all you gotta do here.”
“Except, the grocery store can’t decide that I’m ridiculous and never let me come back. Isaac totally can.”
“He’s not that kind of guy, Rosie. And you know it.”
He wasn’t the kind of guy who would decide he didn’t want to be myfriend.But he could absolutely decide he didn’t want to bemorethan friends.
“Come on. Come eat. Isaac is already sitting with Max. He’ll talk his ear off long enough for you to fix a plate and find a corner to hide in.”
We walked into the kitchen side by side, and Greta immediately looked up, her eyes filled with an unvoiced apology.
I smiled and gave my head a slight shake. My friends were good to me. A little pushy, but good to me.
After dinner, I took baby Nora and the bottle Diedre had prepared for her and settled into the rocking chair in the corner of the living room while Diedre and Jade put Max to bed. Greta settled in across from me. “Are you hiding behind a baby?”
I nuzzled Nora’s fuzzy head. “Possibly. But can you blame me? She is the sweetest.”
“You look good with a baby in your arms.”
“Yeah? I like kids, though I haven’t spent much time with one this tiny. Not since I was in high school.”
“Your cousin, right? She had a baby while you were in high school?”
I nodded. “And she lived with us, so I got lots of baby Shiloh time.”
“Do you want kids someday?” Greta asked.
My earlier Isaac-themed daydreams flitted through my mind. I willed myself not to blush. Greta was asking ageneralquestion. Not a specific question. She had not asked:Do you want to have Isaac’s kids someday?
“I for sure do,” I said. “Two or three, maybe? I was an only child for most of my life, until Marley moved in with us, but I always wished I’d had siblings.”
“I was the oldest of five,” Greta said. “If I have any, it’ll only be one or two. My house was an absolute circus growing up.”
“What are we talking about?” Isaac asked, leaning over the back of the couch.
“Kids,” Greta said. “Do you think you’ll have any?”
“I hope so,” Isaac said. “I think being a dad sounds like fun.”
It was a very Isaac answer. He would be one to recognize the fun parts without necessarily worrying about all the hard that came along with it. Not that he couldn’t handle the hard. It just wouldn’t be the part he focused on. At least, that’s the impression I’d gotten from years of watching his videos and weeks of exchanging secret messages with him. Which obviously made me a very reliable expert.
“Hey, just a heads up. I’m going live in the next ten minutes, so if you don’t want to be a part of it, you better find a place to hide.”
