Page 90 of Forged in Fire
Something flits across his features—surprise, maybe? Like he hasn’t considered that his clumsy attempt at helping might actually mean something to me.
“You went to them to convince them to rescue Kieran,” I continue, working through it out loud. “Because you thought it would help me.”
“Yes.”
Such a simple word. Such a complicated mess of feelings it creates inside me. My shadows respond to the turmoil, shifting restlessly around my feet like agitated cats.
“And this morning?” I step closer, close enough to catch that subtle smoky scent that always clings to him. “You just left. Without a word. Without even waking me after…” My voice catches slightly. “After what we shared.”
His jaw tightens—the only tell he ever gives when something affects him more than he wants to admit.
“I didn’t want to disturb you.”
“Bullshit.” I move closer still. “Try again.”
He’s silent for a long moment, studying my face like he’s trying to memorize every detail. When he finally speaks, his voice is rougher than usual.
“I had things to do, and I didn’t think it would be useful to get you worked up about it,” he says, infuriating me.
“Don’t you think I should be the one to decide whether I should or shouldn’t be worked up about something?” I put my hands on my hips, wishing I wasn’t finding it so hard to stay annoyed at him.
He exhales a deep breath. “I’ve never had to consider someone else’s feelings before. I’m not good at this.”
The admission costs him something—I can see it in the way his hands curl into fists at his sides, in the subtle tension around his eyes. Behind all that careful control, he’s just as lost as I am. Two people used to operating alone, trying to figure out what it means to be partners.
“If we’re going to be together—” I pause, letting the word hang between us like a question neither of us has been brave enough to ask directly. “If we’re doing this, you can’t make unilateral decisions. Not about things that affect us both.”
He doesn’t dispute the assumption about being together. Doesn’t step back or deflect with that professional distance he used to maintain. Instead, he moves closer until I can feel his breath upon my skin.
“I took out insurance,” he says quietly. “To keep you safe from the Guild.”
My blink in surprise. “What kind of insurance?”
His eyes hold mine, and I see something I’ve never seen before—genuine vulnerability beneath all that controlled competence.
“I know where they keep the things that matter most to each Guild member. The people they care about. The secrets they’d kill to protect.” His voice drops lower. “I made contact with them. Told them if anything happened to you, if they came after you, I’d come for them.”
The implication settles over me like a cold blanket. He’s put himself at incredible risk. The Guild doesn’t forgive betrayal, and what he’s describing would be seen as exactly that.
“Riven.” My voice comes out smaller than intended. “The risk you took—”
“Was necessary.”
“For me? You did this for me?”
He doesn’t answer with words, but the way his gaze intensifies tells me everything I need to know. The careful walls he’s built around himself crack just enough to let me see what’s underneath—not the disciplined assassin or the controlled professional, but a man who’s never had anyone worth protecting and is fumbling his way through caring about someone.
“I’ve been taking care of myself since I was a kid,” he says quietly, and there’s pain in his voice he can’t quite hide. “Is it so wrong of me to want to take care of someone else? To not want to be alone?”
I swallow hard, surprised to find tears pricking my eyes. “Oh God, Riven…” I tell him, reaching up to touch his face. His skin is warm beneath my palm, roughened by stubble. “You’re not alone.”
He’s looking at me like I’m something impossible he’s afraid might disappear if he blinks. Like a man who’s spent his entire life in carefully controlled isolation and suddenly found himself part of something he never thought possible.
“What are we doing, Iris?” The question comes out as a whisper.
“Learning.” I rise up on my toes, bringing our faces closer. “Figuring it out together.”
The distance between us disappears entirely. His hands find my waist, warm and steady, anchoring me against him. This close, I can feel his heartbeat against my chest… and it’s racing.
