Page 84 of Finn
“You’ve been carrying something all day. Spill it,” Gabriel said.
I hesitated, then decided there was no point in holding back. “Do you ever think about them?”
“Them?” Gabriel asked.
“The people we left behind. Beric’s nest. Beric himself.”
Gabriel leaned against the counter, crossing his arms.
“Sometimes, I do think about Beric. Our... strange relationship. How I ended up being his favorite,” he admitted. “But I don’t miss the nest or that world at all.”
His honesty caught me off guard, and before I could stop myself, I asked, “What was it like? When you first turned?”
He exhaled slowly, running a hand through his hair.
“Hell,” he said simply. “I didn’t know who to trust. I hated myself for what I’d become, for what I had to do to survive. Most days, I thought it would’ve been better if Beric had just let me die. But then... you came along.”
“Me?” I asked, startled.
“Seeing you again kept me grounded,” Gabriel said. “Made me want to live again, even though I’d become a monster.”
I swallowed hard, his words settling heavily in my chest.
“Seeing you at Scar’s club... that was a massive shock,” I said, my voice quieter now.
“When I found out you’d died on a mission, I refused to believe it at first. But as the months went by…” I trailed off, the memories still raw despite all the time that had passed.
I continued, “Asher helped me through it, you know. He was the one who convinced me to let you go. To stop holding on, because it was only hurting me.”
Gabriel reached out, his hand covering mine on the counter. His touch was warm, steady, grounding me in the moment.
“I’m sorry, Finn,” Gabriel said, his voice filled with quiet regret. “Sorry you had to go through that.”
“You didn’t have a choice,” I said, meeting his gaze. “And you came back to me. That’s what matters.”
He studied me for a moment, his thumb brushing against my knuckles. “Do you miss them? Your family?”
I nodded, the admission pulling at something deep inside me.
“Yeah. Even Donovan, though we weren’t close like me and Asher.” I hesitated, then added, “But I don’t regret choosing you, Gabriel. Not for a second.”
His grip tightened, and for a moment, we just stood there, the weight of everything we’d been through pressing down on us.
But there was solace in it too, a shared understanding that went beyond words.
Gabriel broke the silence, his voice soft. “I don’t deserve you, Finn,” he said.
I shook my head. “Don’t say that. You’re everything to me, Gabriel. You always have been.”
He pulled me into his arms then, holding me tightly.
Much later, we found ourselves on the small balcony outside our bedroom.
The stars were scattered across the sky, brighter than I’d ever seen them.
Gabriel sat beside me, his arm draped over my shoulders, and I leaned into him, content in a way I hadn’t thought possible.
“Do you think we’ll stay here?” I asked, breaking the comfortable silence.
