Page 62 of Overeager
“That’s great,” Faith said easily. “Score one for Noah. What else?”
“It’s just … a feeling.” Eli frowned down at his feet. “I loved Richard in the beginning, but it was … I don’t know, that lovelived in my mind, you know? Because he was intelligent and handsome and he did all the right things. Because he seemed to care for me more than anyone else ever had, except for you. But with Noah … that feeling lives in my body.” Eli pressed a hand to his chest, right over his sore, wounded heart. “Like … a sense of safety. Of warmth. I just feel …goodaround him. And I know he feels the same way. It’s instinctual. It feels solid and real and important, even if logically the situation’s a mess.” He looked up at Faith. “Is that stupid?”
Faith leaned forward, squeezing Eli’s knee in reassurance. “No, it’s not. It’s really lovely, Eli.” She leaned back, brow furrowed thoughtfully. “So are you saying, even if this went south—as far south as it could go—it might be worth it?”
Eli shrugged with a lightness he wasn’t sure he really felt. “There are other colleges. Other career paths in academia even, beyond teaching. But there’s only one Noah. Maybe … maybe I wouldn’t be giving up my career. Maybe I’d just be redirecting it.”
“Yeah, this isn’t even that great a school.”
“Hey.”Eli threw the tasseled pillow at her. “I like it here.”
Faith caught the pillow easily before it could hit her in the face. “I’m just saying. If it was, like, your all-time dream university … But you’re right. It’s just one school.” She crossed her legs, leaning back in her chair. “So what else is holding you back?”
“He’s young …”
Faith waved a hand, like that was inconsequential. “And what exactly about his youth bugs you? You think he’ll get itchy feet? Cheat the way Richard did?”
Jesus. They were really getting into it, huh? Eli was going to need to pay her for therapy services at this point. But he didn’t have any energy left to be prideful about relying on his sister thisway, not after the events of the day. “No, I’m not worried he’ll cheat. I’m worried he’ll … change.”
That was what had predicated the cheating, wasn’t it? Richard changing his mind about what he wanted, about how he wanted Eli to be.
Faith laughed, and he wished he had another pillow to throw at her. “Jesus, Eli. Of course he will. You both will. That’s what people do when they grow together.” Her laughter dropped off, and the look she gave him was sympathetic. “Not all change is bad. Not all change is the reveal of a secret baby obsession and wandering eyes. I’m not saying your situation is … ideal. I’m just saying you seem to already know what you want. You’re just afraid to give in.”
“But I fucked it all up.” The panic rose in Eli’s throat again. “I drove him away.”
Faith cocked her head and, to her credit, didn’t roll her eyes again. “One night of space is driving him away?”
“It is if he never comes back,” Eli said mulishly.
There was already an ache in Eli’s gut, telling him it was wrong to have Noah so far away. Noah should behere, holding Eli tight while Eli spilled all his panicked thoughts. Eli should be positively reeking of Noah’s alpha pheromones, instead of huffing the lingering traces off his shirt from where Noah had last touched him.
“Take the night, Eli,” Faith said with uncharacteristic gentleness. “Sleep off some of this—” She waved a hand to encompass Eli’s general craziness. “—and call him tomorrow. His feelings might be hurt right now, but it’s nothing you can’t talk out.”
Right. One night. One night was fine. Eli would befine. He bit at his lip, giving Faith the most pathetic look he could. “Will you stay though?”
Now Faith did roll her eyes. “Of course, you loon. But I get to choose the movie. And at some point, when you’re not freaking out, you’ll have to answer to keeping this a secret from me.”
“You’ll pick something with too many explosions,” Eli argued, focusing on the important part of that statement.
“That’s the price you pay for my sage wisdom, baby,” Faith told him, rising from her chair with her phone in hand. “Lemme just call Liz to let her know.”
She walked out of the room for privacy, and Eli took out his own phone and sent a message before he could think better of it.
I’m sorry.
He put his phone away immediately, determined to put it out of his mind and give Noah the space he’d asked for.
17
Eli
Eli woke up flushed and aching, his lower belly cramping tightly. He was in his underwear only, having kicked off his pajama pants and the covers at some point in the night, but his skin was still damp and hot to the touch.
He moaned weakly. Fuck.
His heat was here. An entire week early.
It was still building to the first real peak, considering Eli was still relatively clearheaded and not writhing for a knot, but based on the feel of things, that would change by the end of the day.
