Page 92 of Moonlight & Matrimony
“Wh — what about you?”
I don’t answer as I bring my lips to her forehead. Soon enough, she’ll see they're better off without me.
“Okay Bug. Do you want cheerios or fruit loops?” I ask.
Rylin wordlessly pulls the box of cheerios across the island, carefully pouring a small bowl, several pieces landing on the countertop. Sweeping the stray kernels into my hand, I fill her bowl with some milk, and she tucks into her breakfast. Her eyes remain downcast, as they have for the last several weeks. I miss the brilliant blue depths of the little girl who holds my heart in the palm of her hand. Despite our best efforts, and therapy with Evelyn, Rylin simply isn’t ready to talk. I long for just one of her sweet giggles. The sound has started to fade from my memory the longer the silence stretches on.
“Hey love, we’re gonna go out to the ranch. Want to see Oreo and the other barn kitties?” Ivy asks. Rylin momentarily perks up but the excitement disappears seconds later. It feels like every step forward brings us two steps back.
“Do you want me to come with you?” I offer. “I can text Miles and extend my leave.”
“No. It’s okay. You have to get back to work sometime.”
“Okay. Be careful and text me if you need anything.” I kiss both of their foreheads in quick succession and head out the door for my first day back at work.
The cold chill of late November settles in my bones alongside the ghosts that haunt me at night as I pull up to the diner, stealing myself to face the questioning stare of its customers for the first time since the wreck. We’ve avoided public interaction as much as possible since Ivy was released from the hospital.I couldn’t take the longing glances and pity on their faces that followed me while she was fighting for her life.
I exit onto main street, glancing around at the Thanksgiving decorations in the shop windows. The bell chimes over the door as I enter the diner, Rosie’s compassionate gaze meeting mine from behind the counter. She rounds the corner, wrapping me in a sullen embrace.
“How are y'all holding up?” she asks, cupping my cheeks.
My shoulders slump as I suck in a steadying breath. I don’t want to lie. After all, nothing gets past Rosie. “Not sure we’ll ever be the same,” I admit.
“We’re here when you’re ready to come back to us. All three of you.”
I nod in acknowledgement, refusing to say what I know in my heart to be true; there’s no coming back from this. After placing my order for coffee and pastries for the crew, I head back down the familiar path towards the job site, spotting Miles in the parking lot, a look of understanding crossing his features as I approach and say nothing. He won’t pry, and I’m grateful.
Ivy
“Hey Joey,” Griff says, wrapping me in one of his signature bear hugs. “How’re my favorite girls?”
He’s not treating me with kid gloves and it’s like the first breath of fresh air in weeks. “Been better,” I admit. Rylin clings to my hand like a lifeline as Griff crouches down beside her.
“Hey Ry. Wanna come see Misty with me?”
A soft smile tugs at the corners of her mouth, but her smile still doesn’t reach her eyes. Griffin takes her hand and leads her away to the small stable that houses the ponies as Jax approaches from the big house. “Wanted to talk to you aboutsomething,” he says, an expression I can’t quite place flashing over his features.
“Sure. Sit on the porch with me?”
We settle on the twin rocking chairs and I wrap my sweater tightly around my arms to combat the chill in the air. I think back to the time I spent in the hospital, the crappy bedside meals with what remained of my family, my broken body still healing from the wounds, both physical and mental.
“You’re struggling, Ivy. I can see it in your face.”
“I never said I wasn’t struggling,” I bite back, a little of my former fierceness clawing its way out.
Jax’s face softens. “Didn’t mean it like that. Just wanted to offer you an out, is all.”
My brows draw together as I assess his features. “What do you mean?”
He glances around the ranch, as if carefully contemplating his next words. “Colorado,” he says. He must notice the confusion written on my face when I don’t respond so he continues. “Wilder has some land out there, and a nice big house near the mountains. You and Ry could go stay with him for a while. Luca, too, if that’s what y'all want.”
I open my mouth to speak, but he stops me. “It’s obvious this place stirs up bad memories. I can see it every time you pull up to the big house. The way you white knuckle the steering wheel each time you leave. We see you, Ivy. No matter how hard you try to hide from us.”
“I’m sorry.” I bow my head, guilt and shame overwhelming me.
“Don’t be sorry. We want to help you, but I don’t think staying in Oak Ridge is the answer. I can’t even begin to understand what you’re going through, but Jo, it can’t hurt to try.”
When I don’t respond, Jax stands and says, “Just think about it.”
