Page 48 of Moonlight & Matrimony
“He never wanted to be a dad,” she continues. “When the two little lines showed up on the pregnancy test, I was terrified. I waited until the second trimester before I finally told him.”
“What happened?” I know I’m going to regret asking, so I cling to her hand like a lifeline, hiding just how much her words are affecting me. I want her to know she can open up to me, no matter how painful her story is.
“He told me to ‘get rid of it’. I refused, and that was the first time I realized I should be afraid of him.” My blood is boiling, but I keep my breathing steady, not giving any indication of just how angry I am as she continues to speak. “He gripped my hip so tightly when he slammed my back into the wall that he left fingerprints on my skin.”
I give her hand a reassuring squeeze. “I’m sorry you went through that, Ivy.”
The rest of the drive home is silent, a somber mood settling over us. When we pull up to the house, the lights are out save forthe living room and porch lights. The night sky is illuminated by the subtle glow of the moon.
“It’s a beautiful night. Do you want to sit out back with me for a while?”
“Okay,” she says, and I take her hand, leading her through the side gate to the back porch.
Ivy
“Welcome home, Mama!” I rush to the door to help Paige with the diaper bag, Cade following closely behind her with the car seat, nursing pillow, and hospital bag. It’s their first day home and I couldn’t stay away. The nurturer in me wanted to be here for my friend.
“Auntie Paige!” Rylin squeals from somewhere behind me. I turn on my heel, anticipating a very animated Rylin to come barrelling into the foyer.
“Slow down, speed racer. Auntie Paige is healing, and we need to be very gentle.”
“Can I see my new baby friend now?” she asks.
I should’ve known the baby would be her priority. “Let’s step back and let Uncle Cade and Auntie Paige get settled in for a minute, okay? I’m sure they’ll be ready to introduce you to her very soon.”
We back away, giving them ample space to move past us into the den. Cade sets the car seat on the coffee table and Rylin takes off before I can stop her. “Ry —”
“Oh, leave her be, Ivy girl. She’ll be fine,” Nana says. She’s been in the kitchen cooking up a storm for the past several days, preparing meals to stock the freezer. It smells like spaghetti sauce in the cabin, and my stomach growls in response. This must be what it’s like to have a support system around after youhave a baby. All I had was easy mac, and a prayer. I spent my nights crying over spilled breast milk, wishing Rylin would stop crying long enough to fall asleep. She’s the best girl, but she was a very unsettled infant.
“When’s the last time you ate?” Luca’s gruff voice startles me out of my memories. His presence sends a shiver up my spine.
“I’m fine, Luca.” He’s been oddly attentive since the night I told him about Rylin’s birth, spending all of his free time playing with her, pushing her on the swing, and making sure we’re taken care of in every way.Almost.
We haven’t been intimate since he devoured me on the couch, and I’m not really sure how I feel about that. Don’t get me wrong. After hisverythorough services, I’m fucking ravenous for more. Every time he enters the room, my hormones make me feral. There have been heated glances, and lingering touches here and there, but it’s hard for me to reconcile this longing for something I swore I would never pursue, with the fear of it devolving into the nightmare I lived with for so many years. I can’t afford to take that risk, so I continue to remind myself of the promise I made the night I left.Don’t fall in love, Ivy girl.
I take a few tentative steps into the den, looking on as Rylin settles into the corner of the sectional. Cade places the nursing pillow across her lap, and my little girl almost disappears under it. I snort out a laugh at the sight; Rylin has always been small for her age. Paige approaches with a sleeping baby, gently placing her across the pillow. Rylin leans in close to her face, rubbing their little noses together like we often do, and tears spring to my eyes.
“I love you,” she whispers, and that does it. My vision blurs behind the torrent of emotion spilling down my cheeks. I glance over at Paige, who, evidently, isn’t faring any better. I approach, wrapping my best friend in a tight hug before sinking down into the cushions.
“They’re going to be the best of friends,” she says.
“You ladies alright over there,” Cade asks, a look of utter amusement on his face.
“Shut up, it’s the hormones,” Paige says.
Luca plops down on the couch. “What’s your excuse, Ivy?”
“What she said.” It’s not a lie — I'm due to start my period any day.
“So, are you going to tell us her name or is she just gonna go by baby forever?” Luca asks, shifting slightly closer to me so that our thighs brush.
Cade stands next to Paige, pulling her into his arms. “Do you want to tell them?”
Paige looks up at him affectionately, then turns to the rest of us. “I wanted to name my daughter after a strong woman. Someone I’ve always looked up to and admired. Only one person came to mind.” She inhales a shaky breath as she glances over at Nana. “Her name is Sofia Eliana Brooks.”
Nana gasps, tears streaming down her cheeks unbidden as she rushes over to Paige. She places one hand on either side of her face and kisses her on the forehead. “I’m honored, Poodle.”
“I love you, Nana. I couldn’t imagine naming her after anyone else.” She wraps her arms around her grandmother, and I glance over at Luca, his eyes slightly glassy as he watches the scene play out. I squeeze his thigh, holding back my own tears.
