Page 118 of Even Vampires Bleed
I want him.
Oh, how I want him.
My body is strung like a live wire under his touch. It comes alive and answers in a way only he can trigger.
But my heart—my heart is a whole other monster.
I don’t know what this is for him.
I don’t know what he is expecting out of this.
I don’t know, and it’s killing me.
Actually, I know.
And it’s killing me even more because he wants me—my body. He wants our bodies to come alive together.
But this is all it is.
I’m not even sure he wantsme.I’m the only woman available here, after all.
Of course, I know I’m a hypocrite because I want him, too.
I can’t forget how hard I came earlier in the shower, just because he was the one on my mind.
And yet, I can’t do it.
At the first brush of his thumb on my breast, I jolt away.
I don’t have any shoes on. Hell, I don’t have anything to cover myself with, and I don’t have any idea what I’m doing, but I don’t care.
I run.
He might try to catch me, but I’m a bat, and I can run faster than a bird. So, he can’t stop me.
Did I say earlier that I was a coward?
Yes, well, here I am again—running from the conversation we need.
Because, yes, I know we need to speak about this attraction and how it both makes my heart soar and crash all at the same time. I know we need to speak about the past we share, but he has no clue about it.
I know that we need to talk.
But at the same time, I’m not ready.
I feel tears run down my cheeks as I run to nowhere in particular.
It’s when I reach the clay house that I realize I wasn’t aimless after all.
I only discovered the place from this afternoon but it already feels like a haven to me, a place to feel at peace in.
At least I’m not lost in the middle of the forest.
I’ll know how to get back to the house when I decide… If I decide to go back there.
With tears that won’t stop crawling out of my eyes, and with my heart bleeding, I don’t really know if I want to go back.
I might just stay here until Angie or whoever arrives and plead with them to take my place here.
