Page 42 of Haven Bound
His fingers trail along my legs until they’re resting on my knees, his grip firm. “You’re really testing my self-control here, baby,” he teases.
“Stop it!” I laugh, playfully pushing at his chest. “Get your mind out of the gutter and tell me something that I don’t know about you.” While I wait for him to answer, I reach up and adjust my ponytail, trying not to think about how disheveled I look after an entire day of baking. Being able to take my hair down after a long day almost feels just as amazing as finally being able to take my bra off. I can't wait to get out of here with him so that I can do exactly that.
I can’t help the light groan that escapes me when I feel his fingers massage over my scalp, closing my eyes and quickly biting at my lower lip in an attempt to hide the noise. When I open them again, his focus is locked on my mouth. His tongue slides out to wet his own lips as he reaches up to cup my jaw in his palm, using his thumb to pull my lip from between my teeth.
His lips brush against mine, but this kiss isn’t the same as the one we shared just minutes ago. It’s slow and soft, causing warmth to spread through my chest. I lean into him and wrap my arms around his neck, desperate to be closer to him. We break from the kiss, our foreheads resting together as we each take panting breaths.
“You were the first thing I thought of when I woke up every morning, the last thing I thought of when I went to bed every night, and the only thing I ever dreamed of while I slept,” he murmurs, his soft wordscatching me off guard. At first, I’m confused by his admission, but then it hits me.
Something I don’t know about him.
“That’s not really what I meant. I meant like… what did you do in your spare time when you weren’t off…” I pause, tilting my head from side to side as I consider how to phrase my next words. “You know… killing the bad guys?”
He shakes his head and pulls back so that our eyes meet. “None of that matters, Chelsea. The only thing I’ve ever wanted, the only thing I’ve been dreaming of and wishing for over the past seven years, is a future with you.”
I want to know everything about him, everything that I’ve missed out on over the years. I have every intention of bothering him for information until he gives in. For now, I let the words settle in my heart and feel the walls surrounding it begin to crumble.
32
Chelsea
Austin and I spentthe rest of the forty minutes talking about all of the things that we’ve missed in each other’s lives over the years. He told me about all of the places he’s been able to visit thanks to his assignments, and for some reason, it shocked me to hear that some of them have taken him out of the country. I’ve never been outside of California. I’ll admit I’m a little envious of all of the unique experiences he’s had.
He spent most of our time apart only interacting with fellow Legion members, which makes sense. I can only imagine how hard it would be to build any semblance of a relationship with somebody when you have to hide part of who you are.
I couldn’t ask him to open up to me without doing the same. As hard as it was, I told him everything. I told him about my mom and how I’ve struggled to maintain a relationship with her after everything I’ve been through because of the choices she’s made throughout my life. I told him about my history with Jason, how we met, and how things fell apart.
Watching Austin’s jaw clench over some of the details was mildly amusing. I was worried he was going to crack a molar with how tense he seemed. He remained quiet and let me get everything out into the open.
I even told him about Ethan stepping up and giving me a way to channel my heartbreak and anger into something that made me feelpowerful and confident. He was shocked to find out that I’d learned to fire a gun and pleasantly surprised when I told him how much I enjoy the rush of adrenaline that it brings. I think he was even more surprised that it was something Ethan never told him. I knew that Ethan and Austin had remained in touch, but I never asked Ethan for details.
In my mind, Austin had left me and didn’t deserve to know anything about my life. As much as I’d wanted to ask about him, to know where he was or even just that he was alright, I was afraid of finding out that he’d started a new life and had completely moved on from whatever it was that we shared.
Austin confessed that in the beginning there wasn’t a week that passed by where he didn’t reach out to his sister or to Ethan to try and find out how I was doing. It broke his heart to know that I was struggling to even climb out of bed most mornings after he left. It took me a long time to get back on my feet. After a long process of healing and coming to terms with being left behind, I met Jason. Once Austin learned that I was seeing someone, he shared that he stopped asking about me as often.
He figured I was finally happy and moving on with my life and that he no longer needed to look out for me, even if it was just from a distance. Occasionally, my name would come up in his conversations with Ethan or Hailey, but he didn’t ask for more information than what they gave him.
There’s something about knowing that he wanted to make sure I was okay that warms my heart and chips away at what’s left of the wall around it. Maybe it’s because I now realize just how much he truly never wanted to leave me. He only left the way he did because he thought it would beeasier on both of us, never expecting it to cause us the amount of pain and heartbreak that it did.
In Austin’s eyes, he was just my first love. He assumed that I would get over him and eventually move on to build a happy life with someone else at my side, even though the thought destroyed him. He didn’t realize then, and likely still doesn’t realize now, that he’s not just the first boy I ever fell in love with. He’s the man I want by my side for the rest of my life. I fully plan on showing him that I can handle every aspect of the life he’s meant to live.
We managed to get almost everything baked or prepped for the party this weekend, a barbecue meant for the Legion members andnothis family as he had originally told me. A barbecue I’m now attending as not just the dessert caterer but also as Austin’s… date? Girlfriend? That’s something we’ve yet to talk about.
Now, as we stand in the elevator taking us up to the top floor whereourpenthouse suite is located, I’m anxious to spend the rest of the evening with him without any lingering distractions. His hand moves from the small of my back to slip around my waist, pulling my body against his, allowing me to rest my head on his shoulder.
“Are you tired?” he asks, his deep voice sending shivers down my spine. I don’t want to get ahead of myself and assume he means for anything other than to spend time together. Yet I can’t help thinking about where things were headed earlier at Buttersweet.
I hum softly to myself as if in contemplation. “I guess that depends on what you have planned,” I tease. Truthfully, I don’t know if I have much energy to do anything besides relax. I’m desperate to change into comfortable pajamas and lounge in bed after being on my feet all daylong. I also don’t want to disappoint him if he’d planned for us to go out.
It’s almost eight o’clock. All I want to do is crawl into bed, but I’m not ready to say goodnight to him. Especially knowing what he did today.
“Well, I thought we’d start with a massage.” He takes my hand in his when the elevatordings,the doors sliding open to reveal the elegant entryway of the suite.
“That sounds incredible. I swear every muscle in my body is sore right now. I just need to shower first. I feel like there’s a permanent layer of sweat and flour coating my skin with the amount of baking and cleaning that I did today.” I start to pull my hand out of his as we step out of the elevator, but his grip tightens around mine. His jaw is clenched when I turn my head to look at him, his gaze locked on the floor.
“Aus—”
“Can I join you?” His whispered question catches me off guard, causing my heart to stutter in my chest.
