Page 43 of Deadly Knight
They don’t.
Regardless, if she learns I haven’t obeyed her requests, it won’t end how I dream it will. Her happiness, even when she’s with others, is the single thing that keeps my restraint in check and those other men still breathing. If anything, they should be thanking her.
After a couple minutes, the group goes inside after having their phones—tickets, presumably—checked by the bouncer. Sometimes, I linger outside when she’s hanging out with Nora since the places they often go to are small and I don’t want to risk being spotted. But tonight, I head across the street and slip a hundred-dollar bill to the doorman, who merely shrugs and allows me to pass through.
As I hike my hood over my head and blend into the crowd merging into the large room, I tell myself this is simply to stay close for her protection.Onlythat, and not to allow my masochistic self to witness my own downfall while she’s smiling at someone else.
Katya’s group claims a round table near the right side of the room by the stage, so I head for the same side, remaining in the back to keep a clear view over the other circular tables and people settling in for whatever show they’re about to see.
Katya takes the chair in my direct line of sight, Nora to her right, and that asshole on her left. The other couple seems wrapped in their own world and sits across from the trio.
A low buzz of conversation fills the room but is soon extinguished when the lights dim to make the club dark, only the stage’s light allowing me to see Katya. As the performer—a stupid magician—crosses the stage, greeting his guests and flicking coloured cloth around, Katya shivers and wraps her arms around herself.
The asshole immediately sheds his sweater and drapes it over her shoulders. She smiles at him before slipping her arms through the sleeves and hugging the material tight to her.
Fuck off.The only thing that could make this night worse is my father finding her.
The gun in my waistband gets heavier with the reminder of how I could fix my new problem: End his life before he considers putting anything else of his on her, then give her my hoodie, enveloping her inmyscent instead.
Christ.My hands tighten into fists by my side. It’s always bad seeing Katya, but never like this. Never so…pressing. I’ve come to train myself over the decade, the reminder of her wishes making letting her move on possible. But fuck, tonight is the ultimate test of my control.
The most difficult part over the past decade has been witnessing Katya move on and not being able to do a fucking thing about it. Not without breaking her wishes and revealing what I’ve been up to.
Thankfully, there haven’t been many. Rarely do her relationships last months, more often only a few weeks. She didn’t go near anyone until nearly the end of her degree—four years after she left Russia—and it felt like she wiped out the shreds of my long-dead heart, leftover from our breakup, when she did.
Yet, when she had, a tiny—verysmall—fraction of me was pleased she trusted someone. That after years of therapy, she was able to put behind what the four fuckers did to her on thatripped, stained mattress enough to try intimacy. I only wished she moved past the trauma with me, but it’s exactly as she requested: to find herself and heal away from the memories surrounding me and my family.
Maybe, justmaybe, if she ever settles down permanently with someone, I’ll finally grant her wish and leave her be. Once she’s truly happy and officially no longer mine.
Maybe. Or I’ll just kill him before they speak their vows to one another.
The guy on her left leans back in his seat, the movement shattering my thoughts. His shoulder comes close to Katya, like he’s gravitating to her energy. She casts one of her blinding smiles at him, and I die inside all over.
The show begins, and the audience is captivated. Meanwhile, Asshole is captivated by Katya, and I’m captivated by her.
It’s a fucked-up circle that never seems to end.
Okay,so I’m having fun. Certainly a lot more than I assumed I’d be having.
The magic show is entertaining, especially after the beer I’ve nearly finished drinking. It’s helped make the magician’s silly antics that cause the crowd tooohandahhmore bearable.
It’s thanks to the people surrounding me that’s making this a pleasant time. Nora shrieks at almost everything the magician does, and Melissa and her husband have been nice, if not a bit comical. I don’t speak to Melissa at work often.
Then there’s Caleb.
Every time Nora reacts in her loud way, he’s rolling his eyes alongside me. He admitted he thinks magic shows are ridiculous. “Money grabbing” is how he described it, launching into an entire spiel about how magicians only trick people out of their hard-earned paycheques.
I laughed, pointing out he willingly came tonight, and earned a grin in response. A grin that made my stomach flip in a good way. In a way that’s been absent entirely too long.
I turn my head into my shoulder, breathing in the scent of sandalwood. I definitely should have dressed better tonight, underestimating the chill in the air, but Caleb was nice enough to lend me his sweater. It’s large and welcoming and cozy, making me want to curl up in it.
Every few minutes, in between the magician’s acts, he throws me a smile. That’s it. Just a simple acknowledgment, but it’s having such a relaxing effect on me, I’m grateful for him.
Caleb leans closer, his warm breath blowing along my nape with his question. “I’m grabbing another drink. Want a second?”
Given I’m only a few sips away from the bottom of mine, I nod, welcoming the prospect of more alcohol to blur my thoughts and get them off Caleb’s smile.
“You got it. Don’t enjoy the show too much while I’m gone.” He winks and disappears towards the bar somewhere behind us.
