Page 47 of Sawyer
She bit her bottom lip. “Does that mean you've been trying to prove I was responsible for him being in jail for six years?”
She was no dummy. God, he hated the words he had to say. But he couldn’t lie to her. Not now. Not ever again. “At first, that was the plan.”
"So you came to Elk Jaw to trick me into thinking you cared about me?”
Fuck. This was going from bad to worse. “I do care about you, Lele. When I first found out about your testimony and your later arrest. I didn’t look into it at all because it wasn’t really relevant to Jaxon.” God, he had to make her understand. “If I knew then what I know now, I would have fought for you every second of the past six years, too. But I didn't know you. And I’m so damn sorry I didn’t.”
She studied his eyes, and he let her see everything. He had nothing to hide anymore. And he damn sure wasn't gonna lie. So he let her look as long as she wanted to. She must have found something comforting because she nodded before dropping her gaze back to her lap.
“My original plan was to talk to you once you were out of prison. But I didn't keep a close enough watch, and so I didn't realize that you were let out on parole two years early. I found that out the same day we found out Jaxon had been stabbed.”
Worry painted lines on her forehead. “Are you sure he’s all right?”
“Yes, babygirl. He's going to be fine. But my point is, I didn't have time to research your case because things started happening so fast. All I knew was I needed to get close to you to find the truth. I swear to you, that's what I was looking for. The truth. At the time, it seemed to be the truth that you lied to get a reduced sentence.”
She shook her head. Grabbing his arm, she said, “But I didn't, Daddy. I pinkie promise I didn't.”
He took her hand in his. “I know that now, Half-Pint. I believe you. But once again, I didn't know you then. I came to Elk Jaw to get to know you. And the standard procedure for doing that while undercover is to use a fake name. So that's what I did.”
“Even if you did use a fake name at first, what I don't understand is why you didn't ask me? I would have told you. But you waited a whole week before you even mentioned a trial. Even then, you didn’t ask me about mine.”
He chose to ignore the accusation in her tone. “I didn’t ask, babygirl, because I had no way of knowing if you were someone I could trust. Instead, I watched you and got to know you from the way you behaved in your normal day-to-day activities.”
“How much could you get to know me by watching me every night while I tended bar?”
He raked his hands down his face. Confessing this was going to be one of the hardest things he’d ever done. It might very well be the thing that drove her away from him. But he was never going to lie to her again. Never.
He took her hands in his. “I was able to see you when you were at home.”
She shook her head, smiling. “What? How could you see me at home?”
“The first day I was in town, while you were at work, I put cameras in your house.”
She stared at him in disbelief. “Y-You've been watching me? Through cameras like some kind of stalker?”
Oh, this was going to be worse than he’d thought. Fuck.
“Yes. I know it wasn't right. You have every right to be furious. But because I was able to watch you while you were at home and see how adorable and kind and generous and patient and wonderful you are, even when no one's around, even when no one can see you. I saw the real you. I saw there was no way you haddone anything deliberately to put Jaxon in prison. There was nothing you could have said in your defense that could have done that, sweetheart. Everyone claims to be innocent, and almost everyone lies. But not you. Not my Little Half-Pint of sass and strength. You are, without a doubt, the single most honest person I have ever met.”
She waited, staring at him. Probably thinking through all of the embarrassing things she’d done when she hadn't known he was watching. That’s what he would he thinking about.
But she wasn't getting up and walking out. He’d take that as a win for now.
Turning to him, she asked, “So, if you watched me for all those days and decided that I wasn't the bad guy, why didn't you come to me and tell me what was going on? Why didn't you talk to me then?”
If he could only go back in time, he’d have done so many things differently. But he couldn’t. All he could do was try to make her understand. “Because I still had to find proof, babygirl.”
She opened her mouth to speak, but he got there before she could.
“Not proof that you were guilty. Proof that you weren't. My brothers trust me, but we've all borne the burden of finding a way to get Jaxon out of prison for six years. I couldn't count on them taking my word for your innocence. So, I stayed undercover, kept playing my part, and kept digging.”
She raised her hand, like a little girl in school asking for permission to speak. At his nod, she asked, “Did you find anything that would help?”
He hated to have to tell her no. “I haven't found any proof yet. I will, but keeping secrets from you was killing me. When that biker rode by and shot up your house, I knew I must have triggered somebody's warning system because they came after you. And I'msorry about that. But it did, and I had to get you to safety. That was my number one priority.”
Her eyes were on him now, rather than her lap. He wasn't sure what she was thinking. He had no idea what she was feeling. But her eyes weren’t full of hate and condemnation. And she hadn't said her safe word yet. That meant there was still hope, right? God, he hoped so.
“So, I packed you up this morning, and I brought you to Darling. I know Taz was acting up this morning. I wish I could tell you what that was about, but I honestly don't know. I brought you to Darling because I thought you’d love it here, and I knew you’d be safer here. I know the people here will love you. The ones who’ve met you already do. When we finish talking, I'll give you my phone, and you can see all the texts I've been receiving all day from the Musketiaras. Let's just say, I'm not their favorite person right now.”
