Page 98 of Beneath the Mountain Sky
His words just don’t feel true.
Deep in my heart, I know that didn’t happen.
What he said was awful.
It was a personal blow that did exactly what it intended—drew my attention away from his insecurity. But it wasn’t something that should have sent me running from the mountain forever.
A piece is still missing.
Something vital.
Yet even with that gap still there, I know I came back that day.
I shake my head. “No. I remember driving back through town, up the mountain. I was coming home. There was something I needed to tell you…”
Killian lifts his other hand to cradle my face between his palms. “Why? You had every reason to hate me that day, to want to leave me. I took the worst thing in your life, the thing I knew would hurt you the most, and used it as a weapon against you. You should have wanted to get away from me.”
Hot tears streak down my face. “Because I know you, Killian McBride. I had already forgiven you before I even made the decision to come back and turned the car around.”
“Christ, Willow.” His thumbs brush across my cheeks, wiping away my tears as his own threaten to fall. “I never deserved you?—”
And that’s always been his problem.
Killian has never believed he deserves anything.
He’s always working. Always pushing himself. He never thought he did enough for his mother, his brothers, or the town. There was always more he could be doing. More he could be giving.
He took on the weight of caring for McBride Mountain and its residents when his mother died and let it crush him.
That’s what led him to believe he wouldn’t be a good father.
That’s what made him panic.
His need to give everything yet somehow never believing it was enough.
It’s the reason I’ve always loved him.
The reason I still do, despite everything.
I push up onto my toes and feather my lips across his, desperate for the one thing he hasn’t given me since I’ve been back.
Us.
That ignitable spark that’s crackled there since the moment my eyes met his in that hospital. That magnetic pull that’s dragged me to him and his arms each time the darkness releases another memory. That heat and passion only he has ever given me.
The small taste of it in the tent last night proved it all still exists.
For both of us.
He tunnels his hands into my hair and tugs me back from him, halting the kiss, but I can feel how much he’s trembling. Hear the hitch in his breath. “You don’t want to do this, Honeybee.”
I slide my hand over his heart. It beats rapidly under my palm. Solid. Strong. Like the man who lives by it and sometimes lets it get the best of him.
“I do.” I nod. “I miss you, Killian. My heart knows how long it’s been, even if my head doesn’t, and it knows I forgave you a year ago, before whatever it was interceded and stopped me from getting back to you.” Pushing my hand tighter against his chest, I emphasize my point. “This is where I belong. Where I’m meant to be. This mountain, this cabin, with you. The rest we can figure out.”
“Fuck…”
The word comes out more growl than spoken.
