Page 158 of Restless Hawke
Only stark, sincere affection and commitment to her job.
It’s the kind of no-strings-attached love that I only get when I’m with the Hawkes, that they offered me so freely while Dad’s love felt like a noose threatening to tighten.
That love from Coen and the rest of the family is what has kept me going when there were days I wanted to crawl into bed and never get out. When I wanted to go to a dark place, they kept me in the light.
But it leaves me wondering what Dad has to keep him sustained, to force him not to give in to the darkest parts of him now that he doesn’t have my love—and what he might be capable of now that he’s lost it and me.
* * *
COEN
Tommy slidesmy scotch across the bar to me, and I take the glass and thank him before I raise it to my lips and down a sip.
Allegra elbows me playfully. “Scotch tonight? What happened to bourbon?”
I grin at her. “I thought we should save that for when we get home.”
Her eyes widened, her pupils dilating with her instant arousal because she knows exactly what my favorite thing to do with her favorite drink is. I lean in closer to her at the bar at the Hawkeye Club, even though with the sound of the music and people talking, no one would be able to hear me anyway.
I dip my head close to her ear. “Though…we don’t have to wait until we get home. Gabe isn’t here. So, his office should be open upstairs.” I glide my hand up her inner thigh. “He has a couch and a desk…”
She squeezes her legs closed, trapping me and preventing me from advancing. Her eyes dance with amusement and promise. “I don’t particularly want one of your aunts, uncles, cousins, or employees walking in on us fucking tonight, Coen.”
“Who said anything about fucking?”
Scowling, she bats my hand away.
I chuckle as the first chords of “Kashmir” start up, and my humor instantly fades.
Bishop gapes from her seat on the other side of Allegra, turning toward the stage with wide eyes. “Did you know about this?”
I shake my head and motion for Tommy to come over.
Before he can get away from mixing drinks, Isaac steps through the door and makes his way over to the bar, settling on the stool on my other side. His brow immediately furrows. “Is that ‘Kashmir?’”
I nod.
He gapes, turning toward the still-empty stage. “What the fuck?”
“I know, right? I was just about to ask Tommy.”
Tommy finally finishes whatever he was working on and hustles over to us. “What’s up, guys?”
Isaac points absently toward the pole. “I want to know who’s about to walk onto that stage to our mom’s song.”
Tommy’s eyes widen slightly. “Oh, shit. I didn’t know…”
He wouldn’t.
He wasn’t evenalivewhen Mom was on stage, nor were we. But still, it’s like a retired jersey; you don’t just give that song to a new dancer, especially not when the OG is married to the club owner’s brother.
I smell a Hawkeye Club scandal…
A cute redhead finally emerges from backstage, swaying her hips to the beat of the song, the sultry low bass thumping through the club, setting the mood for an intense, slow, sensual dance.
Isaac sighs, then turns his back to her and looks over at me. “I heard you were with Cass and Kennedy earlier.”
I snort and nod. “Yeah. They got into it again.”
