Page 148 of Beautiful Trauma
“I see someone discovered my hideout,” she said with a teasing smile.
My brows popped in surprise. “You were hiding?”
Maeve nodded. “I’m not a fan of crowds. Even when they’re my family.” She gave me a pointed look. “And unfortunately for you and for me, word about Kellan’s injury has gone out among our extended family, so it’s not just my brothers milling around downstairs.”
Even though I knew exactly what she meant, I played it off by asking, “Why unfortunately for me?”
Maeve crossed the distance between us. “Because the last thing you need right now is more family to remind you of the ones you lost.”
Her words sent pain searing through my chest. As I fought to breathe, I tore my gaze from hers to stare back out at the city. “Has Kellan been talking to you again?”
“Again?”
“I heard the two of you talking that night in Dublin.”
“Oh,” she murmured. When I glanced back at her, she sighed. “No, he hasn’t said anything to me except you need your rest.” She took a tentative step towards me. “But I see you, Mila.”
As my heart pounded harshly, I whispered, “What do you see?”
“Someone who has been to hell and back too many times to count.” She gave me a sad smile. “You can’t make journeys like that and expect to bounce back. You have to give the wounds time to heal.”
“Is that how you felt when…” As honest as we were being, I couldn’t bring myself to say the word.
“You mean when my father allowed a man to tear my virginity from my body while forcing my younger brothers to hold me down?”
Swallowing hard, I replied, “Yes, that.”
She nodded. “Absolutely. And on bad days, I experience it all again.”
With a grimace, I said, “I’m not being trite when I say I’m so sorry.”
“Thank you. And I would say the same to you.”
“I wish he didn’t love me.”
Instead of the shock I expected, Maeve didn’t flinch. “Why do you feel that?”
“He’s too good for me. He deserves someone who isn’t broken.”
“I thought the same thing about my husband. That he shouldn’t love a woman who’d been raped and couldn’t bear another man’s touch.” She shook her head. “But it’s bullshit.”
“Is it?”
“Absolutely.” She took my hands in hers. “We deserve their love. Our imperfections help them to be better men just as their imperfections make us better.”
Tears stung my eyes. “I really want to believe that.”
“He’s my brother and I love him, but Kellan has his flaws just like anyone.”
“I’m still trying to find them.”
Maeve laughed. “I have to admit that he’s pretty perfect.”
I snorted. “Thanks a lot.”
Her expression sobered. “The truth is, he has his own baggage, Mila.”
Nodding, I replied, “I know. He’s shared a lot with me.”
