Page 58 of Known By You
“I’m sorry,” I said, finally shoving back and stepping away so she could breathe.
Had I hurt her? Had my… had I been too aggressive?
“Why would you be sorry?” she said, still breathless from our kisses.
I searched for words as my insides felt like they were shriveling up. “I—that was too much. I’m sorry. You just did this nice thing for me, and I shouldn’t have taken that as… anything but you just being a good friend.”
Her laugh made me turn back to her. Her head rested against the door, but her eyes were on me. No more fear there, but I’d seen it. I couldn’t unsee it, or could I? My stupid stomach dropped, and my idiot heart kicked because she was so damn gorgeous, all flushed and disheveled. It was all I could do not to rush right over there and kiss her again.
“I wasn’t being a good friend, Kenny.” She pressed a palm to her forehead, almost like she was testing for fever. “I was saying something true that those people should know.”
Those people.
It stung, but only because she was right not to call them my family. I’d found a new family in the military, and here in Silverton, and that was part of the years-long work I’d done to stand tall in the face of the people I’d come from.
At some point, I’d have to face them again. They wouldn’t just leave, especially if they thought they could get something from me.
But she’d stood up for me when I would’ve walked away, and now I’d let myself get wrapped up in the moment and taken things way too far.
“I’m sorry, Liz.”
“Stop apologizing. You have nothing to be sorry about,” she said, eyes searching mine. We stayed like that, connected through our gazes but standing what felt like miles apart. “But for now, maybe we should take a breath.”
She swallowed and crossed her arms, effectively creating a barrier to herself.
I couldn’t even tell what I felt, but I knew I’d respect her need for space. “Of course. Thank you again and I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?”
With her nod, I left, wondering what that edge of fear in her eyes had been, wondering if she’d forgive me for being so pushy, and wondering how long it’d take me to get past all this.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
Elizabeth
Kenny got pulled into a long-term planning meeting I didn’t attend since I didn’t plan to be in Silverton long.
Wasn’t that just a handy little reminder?
I might not know exactly when I’d return to my regularly scheduled programming, nor did I especially want to focus on it right now, but I wouldn’t be herelong term.
Plus, I needed a little distance from last night. The kiss, first, and my visceral reaction to it, which had scared me because I didn’tfeelthings this strongly. My tossing and turning had done nothing to quell the rioting thoughts that’d only intensified when Kenny left.
My heart ached at the memory.
His family had been so awful to him, I’d had no choice to but rage at them. I’d run the scenario through a dozentimes in my head overnight and every version had me railing at them. I couldn’t regret it.
Nor did I regret the way Kenny had looked at me—like I was some kind of avenging angel on his behalf. It’d felt a little like that.
And then in my apartment… he was so intense and determined to kiss me into oblivion, and I’d been a thousand percent on board until one thought had brought all the passion and enthusiasm to a screeching halt.
What if he was only kissing me because of what I’d done? What if this was more than he’d normally want from me, but he was so caught up in the moment and the emotions his family stirred up, he was lost to the reality of our situation?
And maybe a tiny whisper of a worry that those kisses would consume me and singe every part of my being and leave nothing but ashes in their wake. A pile of ashes couldn’t do anything. It couldn’t run, leave, go. Could it even stay?
We hadn’t discussed things after our kiss two days ago, so I didn’t actually know where we stood, or if there was even a way to figure that out.
What future could we possibly have?
And why the heck was I even worrying about the future?
