Page 4 of Forbidden Billionaires: Vol. 9
“Is that a bottle of cum?” I asked. “I used to get that on the black market from Mexico, but customs really started to crack down on it a few years ago.”
Kyle spit out his beer. “What did you just ask?”
“I asked if it was cum. It’s the best face cream a girl could use. Why do you think my skin…” I paused and felt my face. “Never mind. I haven’t taken a cumshot in weeks so my face is dry as hell.” I shot Ash a sassy look.
“I could help you with that,” offered Kyle.
Ash kicked him. “Stop it. You’re not going to cum on my best friend.”
“I thought I was your best friend?” asked Rosalie.
“You’re my best friend too. But you haven’t visited me all semester.”
“I’ll come more in the spring. I promise. Now let’s go eat some cookies.”
They started to walk over to the cookies, but Ash put her arm out to stop her. “Wait! Is Lauren going to pop out of one of these presents?”
Rosalie shook her head. “No. She’s on the cruise with Mom and Dad.”
“Wow, really?” asked Ash. “What the hell?”
“Yeah,” agreed Kyle. “I dunno why she agreed to go. I turned that shit down so fast. I wasn’t about to go on some old person cruise to Bermuda for Christmas.”
Ash and Rosalie stared at him in disbelief.
“Oh shit,” he said. “Were you two not invited?”
They shook their heads.
“Damn. I always thought you guys were joking about me and Lauren being the favorites. It’s probably because we’re so good at gift giving.”
“Are you though?” asked Ash. “Because it seems like your Christmas present to me is a six pack of beer I won’t drink. And Lauren didn’t bother to send anything.”
“Sure she did.” Kyle reached back into the giant present and pulled out a DVD case with a very sexy Mrs. Claus on the front.
Ash scrunched up her nose. “Stuffing Mrs. Claus? Why would she get me this?”
“Probably because you’re in love with Santa,” said Kyle.
“Exactly! So why would I want to see him stuffing Mrs. Claus? I want him to stuff me.” She coughed. “I mean my stocking. Who wants some cookies? I sure do.” She tossed the DVD on the floor and headed over to the cookies.
She was about to take a bite when there was a knock on the door.
“Who’s that?” asked Ash.
You’ll see.“Santa?” I suggested.
“Santa?!” screamed Teddybear. “I KNOW HIM!”
We all laughed. He really did make a good Buddy the Elf. And even in his silly costume, I wanted to climb him like a Christmas tree.
Teddybear smiled at me like he knew exactly what I was thinking.
Gah, I hated my vow of celibacy. If Ash would just go ahead and lose her V-card, I could get filled at both ends by my hot bodyguards again.
“Seriously though, who is it?” asked Ash.
I walked over and opened the door.
