Page 4 of Life Blood
Iwalked into my mother’s hospital room as I had so many times before. She was going to listen to what I had to say this time, and all of her excuses about losing dad in the accident when I was a toddler weren’t going to work on me. After the night I’d had, coming home to a nearly comatose mother was the last straw.
“Hey, baby girl,” she slurred.
“Hey, mom,” I sat in the chair situated to the right side of her bed and reached for her hand, “You already know what I’m going to say. This has to stop. You’re killing yourself, and I can’t watch you do this to yourself anymore.”
Mom turned her head away from me. “Yeah,” she muttered.
“We’ll talk more about this tomorrow, but things need to change. I’m glad you’re alive, and that I got to you in timethistime,” I said dryly, my irritation growing.
Mom didn’t say another word to me, and I did what I always do when we had these half-sober talks, I put up a wall and accepted it all for what it really was. I wasn’t talking to my mom, I was talking to the addiction. The addiction was her demon, and that demon hated me. So when she cussed me out or blamed my father’s death on me, I steadied myself for the hurtful words that the demon gave her to hurl my way.
I’d listened to her blame me for my father’s death hundreds of times, and it stung me every time, but it was an accident. I’d had to tell myself that over and over. How can you blame a three-year-old for getting a fever at daycare and needing to get picked up? The drunk driver who ran into my father’s car head-on as he was on his way to pick me up was to blame, not an innocent child.
The saddest part is that I can’t even remember him. She spiraled into her alcoholism so fast and became so bitter that she never shared anything about him with me. She was drinking to forget, always, and sometimes I wondered if the drunk driver who killed my father was doing that same thing way back then too.
Without another word, I stood and left the room.
“She’s going to spend the rest of the night here,” I told Jen and her family when I reached them. “She wasn’t as bad as I thought, but the doctor said I made the right decision.”
“Honey, I hate that you go through all of this,” Jen’s mom, Marsha, said while running a supportive hand along my back. “Why don’t you stay with us tonight? You really shouldn’t be home alone anyway.”
I smiled at her and Jon, Jen’s dad, “Thanks for the offer, and trust me, I would, but I have a biology exam tomorrow that I haven’t studied for, and I also have to rewrite that stupid paper for my English class. The last one was a mess.”
“I thought Professor Brooks was going to give you another week on that?” Jen spoke up.
“Yeah, so did I. Sweet old Mrs. Brooks seemed to have forgotten she gave me the extension. I failed it. I’m not surprised, but just seeing that F…”
“I’m surprised you didn’t go home sick,” Jon said with a smile.
I loved this family. They knew me all too well. I really did wish I could stay with them, go to sleep, and just end this day, but I had to go home.
“Are you sure you’re comfortable in the house alone?” Jen whispered after we got into their car.
“I’ve done it before,” I answered her.
“Not what I’m talking about,” she said in a lower whisper, “I called some strange number back right before you beeped in on my cell. Some guy said Jackson and his friends were harassing you tonight while you walked home from work.”
“What?” I tried to keep my voice down.
“What happened to David picking you up, and why didn’t you call me when he didn’t?”
“I just didn’t want to bother you. I don’t need a lecture. I know what you’re going to say.” I eyed her, “Listen, it was stupid, I won’t be doing it again. We can talk about it more tomorrow when we’re alone.”
“Who was the guy on the phone?” she asked.
I sighed, “Some new kid from school, I guess. He took Jase and Paul down like they were twigs. They were all on something.”
“God, Elle,” Jen sat back some, “I can’t believe you’re even holding up right now.”
“Me neither,” I truthfully responded, and she didn’t even know what happened between the mysterious dude and me. I patted her hand, “I just need to get home and focus on what’s important.”
“Do you want me to stay with you?”
“Like I said, I’m fine. It’s all over now. I highly doubt those idiots are going to show up at the house.”
“Lock the doors.”
“Yes, ma’am,” I mocked.
