Page 87 of I Did Something Bad
“What?” I grumble. “What time is it? I was asleep.”
“Asleep? It’s four.” She sighs like a mother who’s trying to wake up her child for school for the fifth time. “Just come and open the door.”
“The d—”
“Now!” Nay yells. “Wewillcamp out here if we have to!”
“I am confiscating your key cards,” I groan as I clamber out of the bedroom.
Both of them physically recoil at the sight of me. “Have we…” Nay sniffs the air. “Showered recently?”
“Yes,” I mumble with all the confidence of someone who is knowingly deploying a liberal definition of “recently.”
“Of course,” she responds.
“What are you guys doing here?”
Thidar glances down at the phone in her hand, and my stomach sinks. “What?” I repeat.
“Did you know Tyler was leaving today?”
Oh. I nod. “He told me at the wrap party on Thursday.”
“We saw the photos of him at the airport,” Thidar says, motioning with her phone. “How are you?”
“Honestly?” They both nod. “I’m… I don’t… We…” It doesn’t come. I’d hoped that not talking to anyone for thirty-six hours would mean that I’d have recuperated enough to get my thoughts in order, but that clearly hasn’t been the case.
“Can we come in?” Nay asks.
While they shut the door and remove their shoes, I pull my robe tighter around me. “So how—” Nay starts.
Detaching itself from my brain, my body lets out a sob, and then another, and another, and, no longer seeing the point in remaining upright, I’m sitting on the floor, knees pressed into my chest, rocking myself as tears that I was certain had dried up stream down my face. Two hands land on either side of my spine—not stroking, not rubbing soothing circles, just secured there, letting me know that it’s okay, I can fall apart, they’re here now.
I slouch sideways into a fetal position onto Thidar’s lap. Nay lies down sideways, too, one hand propping up her head while the other tucks my hair behind my ear.
“I almost murdered someone,” I blubber, figuring, hey, there’s never going to be agoodtime to tell them.
They both freeze. Nay chews on her bottom lip, and, after a periodof silence, asks, “Like… in a dream? Or metaphorically? With your words?”
I shake my head. “In the park. In the flesh.”
“The park,” Thidar states.
“On the first day of filming. And Tyler was involved and the police were looking into me and it turned out the guy had been stalking me for months but then it—”
“Woah there, halt, time out,” Nay says, grabbing my face with both hands. “You’re saying a lot of weird combinations of words right now, and frankly, the snot is making it difficult to understand you. I’m going to go and pee, and then I’m coming back with tissues and some water, andthenyou’re going to walk us through the whole thing. Okay?” I nod.
Approximately five minutes later, she returns and plops back down on the floor in her initial position, but not before first placing the promised tissue box and mug of water between us. “Take a sip,” she instructs, and I lift my head and obey. “Now blow,” she says, giving me a piece of tissue. When I’m done, she says, “Now talk to us.”
“Well… fuck,” comes Thidar’s voice from above when I’m done laying it all out. “You… and then… I mean… fuck.”
I rotate so I’m on my back and I can look up at her, although from this angle, all I can see is her chin. “Are you guys mad I didn’t tell you?”
“No, we’re—” Thidar starts at the same time that Nay hits my shoulder and says, “Of course we’re mad!”
Thidar tilts her head to glare at Nay. “We’re notmad.”
“Yes, we are!” Nay snaps. “You were going to go toprisonand not tell us? What the actual fuck? We’re your best friends! I once fished a menstrual cup out of your vagina!”
