Page 53 of Let the Game Begin
He scrutinized me and I felt myself withering under that golden gaze—sometimes so bright, sometimes so shadowed.
“Don’t fall for your boyfriend’s whining; it could be a tactic to keep you under his thumb. You really want your freedom? Then go in there and take it.” He moved closer, and I gave him a surprised look. Apparently he’d been listening to us. But if he had, how could he be so cynical about it?
“Don’t you fucking tell me what to do!” I raised my voice and Neil groaned, closing his eyes. I frowned, confused and dismayed by his reaction. A second later, he opened his eyes back up, and I watched him approach me slowly like a large, deadly cat. I backed away, fully aware that there was nowhere to go.
“Say it again,” he whispered, looming over me with his Adonis body. I stared at him and soaked in his pleasant amber aroma. His hair was still a little damp, probably from one of his countless daily showers.
“W… What?” I stammered, my butt bumping into the counter behind me.
“Fuck,” he breathed, warm air hitting my face. “I really like the way that word slides off your lips,” he added wickedly, locking eyes with me. “Wanna know what I’m thinking about?” He closed the distance between us and puthis hands on either side of my body, pressing his chest against my breasts and pushing the air out of my lungs. I could feel the hard outline of every one of his muscles as though fused to my skin.
“No,” I murmured in a daze. I didn’t know whether it was his voice, his body, or his stare that rendered me so helpless. He nuzzled my cheek with the tip of his nose and breathed in my scent appreciatively.
“I’m thinking about how much I’d like to take you right here in this kitchen with your boyfriend sitting a few feet away from us. About you grinding your hips underneath me while I enjoy a nice, hard…” He stopped next to my ear and smiled. “Fuck,” he said again slowly, as though trying to lodge the word firmly in my brain.
I gasped and trembled.
I closed my eyes, imagining my body, delirious with lust under Neil’s hands. I quite tried to tamp down those profane thoughts, but Neil grabbed the back of my neck and rubbed my lower lip with his thumb. His hand was big and strong; the pad of his thumb felt cold against my overheated skin. I opened my eyes slowly and saw his own blazing eyes locked on my mouth.
I needed to get back to Jared and quickly.
“Neil,” I pleaded softly, trying to create some space between us. I stepped to the side and turned to finish making the hot chocolate. I tried to take slow breaths and calm my furiously pounding heart. I stood up on my tiptoes in an effort to reach the mugs arranged on a high shelf until Neil reached out and effortlessly grabbed them for me, setting them down on the counter. I thanked him softly, staring at my trembling hands.
I had reached such a fever pitch of anxiety that I was completely thrown off-balance.
“Selene, is everything okay?” Jared inquired.
He had joined us in the kitchen. Neil retreated, if only just a bit and remained as austere and unmoved as ever. Jared’s face grew guarded, and he watched me with concern.
“Yeah, I was just asking Neil where the mugs were.” I pointed up to them and smiled at Jared before pouring the hot chocolate, being very careful not to make a mess with my shaking hands.
“Do you need any help?” he asked, but I quickly shook my head.
“No, I’ll be with you in just a minute.” I gave him a reassuring smile and Jared nodded, leaving the kitchen. Though not before throwing one last distrustful look in Neil’s direction. I couldn’t blame him: Neil was not the type to inspire trust in either women or men.
I touched my forehead; I had broken out into a cold sweat. Neil then approached me cautiously and put his hand on my neck, right in the exact spot Jared had been kissing just a few minutes before on the sofa. He rubbed my skin slowly, possibly intending to calm me down, but all he did was cause a blaze of heat in the middle of my chest.
“Wait for me tonight in your room…” he said in a lewd whisper before pressing a gentle kiss to the skin right below my earlobe.
My body’s reaction was instantaneous and in sharp contrast to the way I’d reacted to contact with Jared. Goosebumps erupted on my skin and warm flood of liquid soaked my panties, forcing me to clamp my legs together.
After completely devastating me, he left and I was finally alone and could breathe again. I grabbed the two steaming mugs and went back to the living room and to Jared, where I apologized for the long wait.
“Are you sure everything’s okay?” he asked as I settled down next to him, cupping the warm mug in my hands. I could still feel that uncomfortable wet sensation between my legs and my body was tense and shaky. Goddammit! Why did Neil have such power over me?
After we finished our hot chocolate, Jared and I watched a movie—I didn’t understand a single thing about it. My mind was far away. Still, from time to time, I would nod or pretend I’d been listening to Jared’s comments on certain scenes, which flashed before my eyes without actually registering in my brain.
Despite my confused state, when Jared put his arm around my shoulders, I leaned into his chest and allowed myself to be lulled into sleepiness. Jared stroked my hair, which tumbled freely down my back, and I just lay there, enjoying his touch even as I knew, deep down, that my continued silence was wrong. I closed my eyes, trying to hold back the guilty tears that threatened to fall.
Jared kissed my temple, then, unexpectedly, he tilted my chin up withhis index finger and brought his lips to mine. Ours was a gentle, sweet kiss, so different from the ones that Neil was making me accustomed to. Our kiss tasted of concealed tears, concealed goodbyes, of unforgivable mistakes, and also of a profound fondness that I now understood would never become love. I kissed him back but only because I didn’t want to make him suspicious.
“I love you,” he whispered, and I, as though compelled by some dark force, slowly moved my gaze to the stairs where a shadowy figure was observing us from the upper floor.
Neil stood there, his elbows propped up on the railing and his long legs stretched out behind him. His broad shoulders were tensed, as though he had the weight of the entire world on them. I couldn’t see the brightness of his eyes but I knew that he was watching us.
“Wait for me tonight in your room…”It seemed that I could hear those words again on the air. Or maybe it was just the echo of my own desire, the need I had to kiss him, touch, and possess him.
Still.
