Page 96 of Delayed Intention
“You would?”
Instead of an answer, Lily leans forward into me while stretching up on her toes and, before I can remember to breathe, she kisses me. I wrap my arms around her waist and draw her against me. The kiss isn’t passionate so much as gentle, like she’s reassuring me. Maybe she is.
I pull back just enough to speak. “Thank God.”
With that, I pull her close and feel her lips curl into a smile as we kiss again. A surge of heat fills my chest and I’m lost in our kiss, and the feeling of her body in my arms again. While I’m joined with her—the sun, the breeze, the sound of birds—everything is amplified. Everywhere our bodies are touching is sending a current of awareness and lust through me. I move my right hand off her waist, grab the back of her hair and deepen the kiss before pulling back, coming up for air.
“I missed kissing you, but that… felt like something more.”
Her lips are swollen and red, and she’s staring at my mouth. “It sure did.”
Looking her in the eye, I tell her again. “I love you, Lily Anna, so much.”
I can’t stop smiling, but it seems she can’t either, so I suppose I don’t look as unhinged as I think I do.
She turns her head and rests her cheek against my chest. “Then it’s a good thing I love you too.”
Rehearsal
Lily, Estes Park, June 13, 2025
The last three days have been a blur. The wedding is tomorrow night, and the rehearsal is this afternoon before Shabbat. The entire week has gone by so fast. The weather’s been perfect, and we filled the days with family hikes, horseback riding, and tons of meals. It honestly has felt like we’re either eating, cleaning up, finding another place to eat, or snacking.
I pull into the driveway of the home Tamar and Arjun are renting, which is a large cottage on a hill overlooking the town. As I drive around the bend, I see the entire side facing the valley below is all windows, and the views must be incredible. They’ve more room than they need, even with the local college students they had hired to help watch everyone’s kids. They offered to let me move over here from the hotel, and I’m more than happy to join them.
After the hike with Josh on Tuesday—and that kiss—my God that kiss—we decided to keep our situationship low key for now. That the focus should be on the wedding the rest of the week. For now, that means we’ll try to keep quiet about what’s happening between us and discuss everything again after everyone goes home. Making this week about family meant spending more time with my siblings, which has been more healing than I’d expected. I even had a surprising encounter with Daniella. While the extended family was horseback riding, she and I ended up in a separate group with the younger children and had a blast. There was no deep talk or open acknowledgment of past issues between us. It was that we were able to make a new memory together.
Last night, I went on a pub crawl with Joseph and his husband Eli. We kept bumping into cousins and other wedding guests, including Felicia’s hometown and residency friends—everywhere we went. Eventually, we all merged into one large group. I paced myself a bit better with the alcohol, swapping in mocktails for two out of every three drinks. Eli is an incredible dancer, which is apparently wasted on my brother, so we danced while Joe chatted with everyone at the bar.
All these new memories, I know, don’t erase the past, but they feel important—like treasures I get to carry back home with me, in my daily life.
I pull my luggage out of my SUV and head into the chaos of my sister’s rental home. Her three children are running around playing some kind of indoor tag game with Emunah and two of Michelle’s daughters. After I make it past the foyer, I spy Michelle’s toddler seated in Georgette’s lap on a sofa. I haven’t seen Georgette since our talk at the spa. Her generation has been gathering for coffee, meals and walks at the condo that Nona rented, away from the general chaos and noise.
I drop my things—except my garment bag—in the foyer when Arjun comes around the corner with a roll of paper towels in one hand and cleaning spray in the other, looking disheveled.
“Ah Lily, you’ve made it. Welcome to the jungle. Your room is just over here,” he points with the nozzle of the spray bottle, “And don’t worry, all the kids’ bedrooms are in the basement, where they belong.”
I laugh, “Thanks, lead the way and I’ll just put all this down so I can make myself useful.”
Arjun shows me to my room before we hear the unmistakable sound of children arguing—his cue to leave. I hang up my dresses for tonight and Saturday. Emunah finds me and tentatively knocks on my door.
“Hi Emunah, how are you doing?”
“I’m okay. I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too.”
“Can I stay in here with you for a minute?” I recognize the signs of being overwhelmed by all the togetherness.
“I was going to go help and find your Aunt Tamar, so she knows I’m here, but I’ll tell you what. You can unpack my stuff for me, and then when I get back, you can show me where everything is, okay?”
Emunah lights up—she loves organizing. “Of course, I can do that.”
Walking into the kitchen, I find Roselyn talking to Tamar. I let her know that Emunah is unpacking for me.
“Thanks for doing that Lily,” Roselyn pours me a glass of wine after raising the bottle in my direction and seeing me nod. “That’s the perfect thing for her to do.
I smile, “My anxiety can read hers from a mile away. It’s no problem.”
