Page 131 of Rakes & Reticules
“I don’t know, is there, my friend?” What possessed her to reply with the tone she normally only reserved for her brother, Hazel didn’t know. The ire that had been simmering within her all summer had bubbled to the surface. She needed escape before Lord Thornsbee extracted the truth from her: that she was still in love with him and had no desire to remain his friend.
He cupped his hands about her shoulders, and the warmth of his palms through the thin muslin of her gown played havoc with her heartbeat.
Gazes locked, he said, “If I’ve offended you, simply state what it is I’ve done so I can atone for my mistake.”
The man was no dullard, yet he appeared entirely unaffected by her continuous referral to him as a mere friend. Of course he was fine.Hewasn’t the one who spent three months pining away the sun-filled days. Hazel closed her eyes as she recalled how he had candidly admitted it was her company that he sought out at every social event but also in the same breath explained that he wished to only remain friends.
Even after an entire summer, the sting of rejection caused her cheeks to burn. Misty eyed, Hazel slowly raised her gaze to meet his. Blinking away the tears that threatened to escape, Hazel acknowledged she could no more make his heart skip for her than she could prevent her own heart from melting at the twinkle of panic in his blue eyes.
Well aware of his philosophy that apologies were not for those you love, she looked directly at Lord Thornsbee and replied, “You’ve done nothing that requires an apology.” Her voice quivered and her ire bubbled to the surface. She was no meekish miss.
Hazel twisted and shrugged to dislodge his hands from her. “A good eve to you, Lord Thornsbee, I’m off to find my…” She wanted to say future husband, but the words refused to roll off her tongue.
With one eyebrow raised, Lord Thornsbee finished her sentence for her. “Your brother?”
“No, not my brother.”
The cocky smile that Lord Thornsbee gave her nearly swayed her conviction to avoid the man. Struggling to combat the fluttering in her belly, she glanced about the ball room and caught sight of her best friend. “I’m off to find Lady Daphne.”
“Ah… as always, my competitor for your company. I heard she recently married and is now Baroness Harlowe. How is she adjusting to married life?”
If she stayed and conversed with the man any longer, she doubted her willpower to resist his charms. She would end up remaining by his side all evening, the exact opposite of what she needed to do.
Hazel shook her head at him and said, “Never again shall I fall into your trap.” With the snap of the wrist she unfurled her fan. From behind the black lace, she added, “A good eve to you, Lord Thornsbee, and don’t…don’t even consider following me.” She turned on her heel and fled.
* * *
The lump lodgedin Samuel’s throat had him gasping for air and rooted to the spot. He wanted to ignore Hazel’s request and chase after her. Should he swallow his pride and beg for forgiveness?
Raised up on his tiptoes, he scanned the room, avoiding the inviting gazes from his prior lovers. He wasn’t interested in a tryst or the company of another woman. No, he wanted Hazel by his side. To hell with his vow to never apologize to the woman. He marched forward, weaving his way toward the terrace. Having spent an entire Season accompanying Hazel about, he would wager his entire estate that the chit had escaped into the gardens to hide. She was most likely engaged in her favorite pastime—star gazing.
Fearful that another might find her alone in the gardens, Samuel hastened his strides and exited through the terrace doors, leaving the stuffy ballroom and its occupants behind. If it weren’t for Hazel’s presence, he’d be happily ensconced in his study sipping on a brandy and reading the latest scientific journal. Guilt had turned his stomach sour and he’d reluctantly donned his evening attire all in the hopes of an opportunity to explain to Hazel that he’d remained in town during the summer months to avoid attending the plethora of house parties which were famous for scandals and impromptu weddings. She of all people should understand that he would never jeopardize all the effort he’d made to shed his rakish ways and restore his reputation as befitted the Thornsbee title. His only regret was the distance he’d placed between himself and the woman he could not seem to banish from his thoughts.
For months he’d replayed Hazel’s brave confession over and over in his mind. Preoccupied with the demands of his estate and the intricacies of the matters being discussed in the House of Lords, he’d had no time to focus on the matters of the heart, which is why he had responded to Hazel’s declaration of love candidly. He had not considered her anything more than a friend. When she suddenly left London without bidding him farewell, the emotions that rioted within him left him at a loss as to what to do. From past experience, he’d learned it was best not to take action when conflicted. He had remained in town and focused on setting his affairs straight. As the days became weeks, he’d contemplated his relationship with Hazel. Never had a woman retained his attention for longer than a fortnight, let alone an entire Season. It had to be due to the fact that he had remained friends with Lady Hazel rather than complicating their relationship by acting on his baser desires to take the woman into his arms and kiss her senseless.
The shimmer of pale green silk between the hedges caught his eye and brought his thoughts back to the present. He slowed his footsteps and silently approached.
“Hmmm…where is the plough this eve?” Hazel’s mumblings soothed Samuel’s racing heart.
He peered around the hedge prepared to do whatever it took to gain her favor once more. Moonlight twinkled off the jewels sprinkled in her hair. The queen’s keen eye for beauty was indisputable, and Hazel was no exception. While most sought out the title of the Season’s incomparable, Hazel had deemed it a curse, claiming it had only garnered her ill will from the ladies of the ton. He’d appointed himself as her protector from the harsh whispers uttered behind fans and the not so subtle glares of jealousy despite knowing he wasn’t worthy of Hazel’s company. It was hardly a plausible excuse except he couldn’t help but want to be near her. He hated the idea of her being harmed by others. His hands clenched at his side as he acknowledged that he had been the one to bring tears to her eyes last Season.
Samuel released a sigh and stepped up behind Hazel, mouth opened to utter the apology he owed her. Except when Hazel looked over her shoulder at him, the wordsI’m sorryrefused to tumble forth. She deserved better from him.
“Why are you here? I asked you not to follow me.”
“It’s unwise to be out in the gardens alone.” His mind raced. What to say next? Unable to find the words that might make things right between them, he shifted his weight from side to side. How was he to make amends for ignoring her all summer if she refused his company?
She turned around and faced him. “Being anywhere in the vicinity of you is a mistake.”
Her words stabbed in the chest and he placed a hand over his heart. “You wound me.”
Hazel scowled at him and said, “Don’t act as if my words mean a thing to you.”
She stepped to the side to walk around him but he couldn’t let her leave, not on these terms. Samuel caught her by the elbow and spun her around until they were once again face to face. Her cheeks were bright pink and her brows were raised in surprise. The sudden urge to lean forward and kiss her shouldn’t have been a surprise. After all, he was a rake. No—he was a reformed rake, and it was all because of Hazel. He no longer sought refuge in the warm embrace of a woman to banish his loneliness. Now all it took was a smile from the woman who remained stock still next to him. And he wasn’t referring to the strained upturn of the corners of her mouth she adopted when surrounded by their peers.
Wanting to once again experience the lightness that came with seeing Hazel smile, he cocked his head to the right and pleaded, “Don’t go. Stay…please.” His hand fell to his side.
Hazel crossed her arms over her chest and released a deep sigh.
