Page 31 of A Forgotten Heart
The sincerity in his voice broke through all her walls. Her resolve shattered into a million pieces, and her face crumpled. She couldn’t pretend any longer.
Tears trickled down her cheeks.
Nick’s hand cupped her face, brushing them away. “Oh, El.”
“Stop calling me that.” But her words fizzled, mute, pointless. She pressed her face into his hand.
He raised his other hand to cup her jaw. Whispered, “El, please, just let me love you?”
She squeezed her eyes closed, but it didn’t stem the flow of tears. Why couldn’t she just have this one stolen moment? “You don’t love me,” she mumbled.
He leaned down, now holding her face between his hands, and kissed one of her tears. “I have always loved you.” His lips brushed her other cheekbone. “You’re my wife. I would kiss away all of your tears if you would just let me.”
He pulled back slightly, and she opened her eyes, looking up into his dear face.
Every memory they’d shared five years ago, every touch, every smile, rushed in all at once, overwhelming her. Before she could stop herself, her hand slid behind his neck, pulling him closer.
He whispered “El” before his lips brushed hers.
She tasted the saltiness of her tears on his lips.
For so long, she’d told herself not to think about him. She’d believed him when he’d said he wouldn’t spare her another thought that night he’d ridden away. Maybe he hadn’t.
But she couldn’t deny that this was the place she always wanted to be. In Nick’s arms. His hands closed around her waist, holding her tenderly.
If only she never had to wake up from this dream.
A dream. Not reality.
Her eyes flew open, and she gasped, breaking their kiss. She pushed against Nick’s chest, inching away.
What was she doing? Nick would despise her for this when he remembered.
He let her slip away, his face pinched with confusion.
They stood there, facing each other, the sound of their breaths filling the silence.
Her hands came to her cheeks. They flamed hot. How had she let this happen?
“El?”
She couldn’t think. She needed distance. Needed her walls back.
With eyes averted, she circled around him to reach her scarf with a trembling hand. “We need firewood. The doctor must have a stock outside somewhere. I just need to uncover it.”
Nick didn’t say anything, but she was aware of his stare, how close he still stood behind her.
“I’ll stay next to the building, in the back alley,” she babbled, unnerved. “Surely it has to be close.”
They both knew the night would grow too cold to survive if the fire dwindled and died. He stayed where he was as she moved toward the door. Did he feel how much that kiss had unnerved her? Why wasn’t he saying anything?
She stopped with one hand on the latch. Couldn’t look at him.
He sighed quietly. “If you aren’t back in five minutes, I’ll come out after you.”
She knew he’d keep that promise. She nodded and slipped out into the night.
She hovered for a moment on the stoop, one hand covering her eyes. She’d kissed Nick.
