Page 32 of A Secret Heart
Kaitlyn and the girls waved as they moved toward the house.
Ed looked at the hole. Then the setting sun.
He didn’t want to dig anymore. He might as well call it a night.
He began the walk home. Was it really his best chance to win Rebekah? He’d given up in school when she was twelve, writing about Isaac. Now she thought she was writingtoIsaac.
Patch followed along beside him, head down, almost as if he were mirroring Ed’s mood. When Ed reached his place, he shooed a hand at Patch.
“Go on home now.”
With a push, he opened the door to his cabin. A hint of light remained. Enough to light his lamp. He carried it to the workbench. The cabinet was close to completion, but his deadline loomed even closer. As he lifted an arm to sand the wood, his muscles screamed. If Isaac were back here, he’d have another pair of arms for all this endless work. But if Ed wooed Rebekah, the entire plan for Isaac would blow up in his face. If he didn’t woo her, she might end up with Isaac. What if that made her happy? What if it didn’t? Her handshake of friendship that night at the homestead flashed through his thoughts. How she’d grinned at his teasing on the way to Quade’s house, even opening up about her dreams.
His arm dropped to his side. There wasn’t a place in him to pull from to work on the display case tonight, and he had another day of backbreaking work waiting on him tomorrow.
What if he asked Rebekah to go courting? He imagined her expression if he tried to tell her face-to-face. Would she be happy to have him court her? He wasn’t Isaac. Isaac had always been all charm, while Ed was…Ed. Kaitlyn’s advice echoed in his mind. But what if Rebekah turned him down? He’d be losing to Isaac all over again. Only worse.
A flash of a barn dance from when he was fifteen wove its way into his crowded thoughts. He’d been wanting to ask the pretty, dark-haired cousin of Jeb to dance but couldn’t work up the courage. That was when his buddies had brought him a cup of something sure to give him a bolster. More like a horrid stomachache. One that’d left him running for the back of the barn to heave the contents of his stomach while Isaac twirled the pretty girl onto the dance floor. Ed had passed Rebekah on the way out, her brows lifted high at his stumbling rush. Not to mention the humiliation of his brother’s scolding all the way home for drinking what he’d later discovered to be moonshine.
When he’d confessed to Pa why he’d done it, Pa had told him to quit trying to be someone he wasn’t. God had made him Ed, and that was all that mattered. In time, the right girl would see him as her hero. Just as he was.
He let the sandpaper fall to the floor beside the display case, his eyes going to the most recent letter sitting on top.
Kaitlyn had told him to court Rebekah. But he didn’t have enough courage to ask her outright.
A letter had started it all. He’d write another one. Maybe his words on paper could change her mind.
He grabbed up a paper he’d been reserving for writing up invoices and began his letter. Writing furiously, he poured his heart out on paper. It wasn’t long before he had a letter he was satisfied with. One with all his declarations of feelings for her. After reading it one more time, he picked up the pen to sign his name. And stopped.
He stared at the page. If he signed this, there was no going back. If he won Rebekah, how would he explain all this to Drew? Surely Kaitlyn would soften his brother, who didn’t know about Ed’s conundrum.
He’d spilled out his feelings on the page. If Rebekah knew him like he’d begun to know her, she’d guess it was him. It seemed so obvious. He stared at the paper, his shaking fingers clutching the pencil. Did Rebekah want him? Ed McGraw?
He was afraid to find out. He left the signature blank and folded the paper to stuff it in the envelope, then put the direction on the outside as he’d done at least half a dozen times before. This time, his anticipation for a reply swirled in his gut with a fear he’d never faced before.
He wouldn’t sleep tonight, that was for certain.
* * *
Rebekah touched her fingertips to her lips as she reread the lines once more.
Every time I find your letter in the box, my heart aches with joy at the thought of reading it…
This letter mined the depths of romance unlike any before it, almost as if Isaac knew it was her. As if he were truly falling in love with her.
I long to hear what you have to tell me…
This was what she’d always wanted. From the very moment she’d first laid eyes on Isaac McGraw.
I can hardly concentrate until I can find a place all alone to read your words…
So why did Ed’s face keep invading the space in her head as she read the letter? His comments about what he’d really thought about her in school. The fact he liked her writing. His hand at her hip as he’d boosted her into the saddle at Quade’s place. The protective way he’d checked the barn and house.
Rebekah ran her fingers from her lips up her cheek to her temple. Nothing made sense now that she and Ed were friends. Life had been easier when they hadn’t had a nice thing to say to one another. Hadn’t it?
“What is that? Is that another mail-order bride letter?” Mr. Sullivan’s sharp baritone over her shoulder sent a jolt through Rebekah.
“It’s personal,” she murmured as she slipped the letter back in its envelope. Her cheeks flushed. If only she’d waited until later to read her letter.
