Page 459 of Conveniently Wed
“I asked Josiah to join me, but he said he trusted you.”
She whirled around. “That’s a laugh. And what do you mean you’re leaving?”
He moved close enough to look in her eyes, but didn’t touch her. “I have to.”
“Where are you going?” Her voice wavered. “For how long?”
“Not sure where the good Lord will take me.”
She pressed her fingers to her temples and rubbed at the throbbing headache his nonsensical words were giving her. Where was he going and why was he talking about the Lord as if he believed God would actually lead him?
“I must ask for your forgiveness, Katie, as I’ve already done with Josiah. I’m so sorry for encouraging a relationship with you that only belongs to Josiah.”
She pushed down the guilt his comments stirred. “You know better than anyone that Josiah wants nothing to do with me. Why the sudden bout of conscience? It’s not as if we did anything immoral.” Yet, even as the words left her mouth, the lie in them clutched her throat.
He shook his head. “We did, though. The time we spent together, including our midnight walks in the garden, were not leaving room for reconciliation. I take complete responsibility. I knew you were struggling. I also knew that Josiah loved you, no matter how hard he tried to hide it.”
Katie drew a sharp breath in.
“I relished your company and encouraged every moment you gave me. Instead of pushing you toward Josiah, I sucked up the attention like the sand in a desert rainstorm. I let myself love you, knowing full-well you belonged to my best friend. That was wrong…so very, very wrong.”
“But—”
“Please, let me finish. You are, and always will be, a temptation to me. The Bible is clear about temptation, and God tells His followers to flee it. So, I have to leave.”
Anger burned inside her. Maybe irrational anger, but she couldn’t seem to stop it. “The good Lord, Colby? The Bible? Since when have you read the Bible?”
“I became a Christian the other day, and it’s amazing how the Bible makes sense to me now.” A smile warmed his face. “I’m at peace like never before.”
A shuddered breath slipped through her lips. Colby was her last vestige of comfort, and now this God would take even him.
“Why can’t you stay? Why can’t we remain friends? Josiah needs you on this ranch.” She stepped forward, but he stepped back.
“I can’t speak for you, but I know in my mind I was way beyond friendship. We can never go back. I’m so sorry. Please, forgive me.” Warmth and sincerity poured from his eyes.
Her heart lurched in response. But he was asking for forgiveness. If their relationship had been so wrong, then she needed forgiveness also. Yet she couldn’t face that yet.
She turned away, holding her back straight. “I guess this is good-bye, then. Turns out, you’re just like all the rest.” Tears broke through her defenses, and she swiped at them fiercely.
“It’s not like that.” He placed a hand on her shoulder.
She shrugged it off. “You can have your God and this ranch.”
“Please, try to understand."
She turned to meet his gaze. “I understand more than you know, and I’ve had a lot of time to think. You stay, and I’ll go. I don’t want to come in the middle of your partnership, of your dreams. If you go, Josiah will have too much to?—”
“No.” Colby’s tone was sharp. “Josiah understands how he messed things up with you. Give him a chance. Besides, everything was fine until I arrived on the scene. So, no. I go. You stay. It’s God’s will.”
Katie gazed up. Instead of the haunted look she had become so accustomed to, a peace and strength radiated on Colby’s face. If only she could find such peace. She moved closer and placed a trembling hand on his cheek. “Be happy. Get as far away from me as you can. I don’t bring happiness to anyone.”
A rush of red filled his face at her touch, and he folded his hand over hers and lowered her hand away.
“I’ll pray you and Josiah find love again.”
“Love?” She couldn’t keep the bitterness from her tone. “He won’t even look at me.”
“I’ll also pray that someday you’ll understand, and look back on my good-bye as demonstrating a far greater love than if I had stayed.” He squeezed her hand, then released her. After crushing his hat on his head, he turned and walked out the door without looking back.
