Page 412 of Conveniently Wed
Panic welled in Katie’s throat at the thought of Josiah leaving her alone with this stranger.
Maybe he saw the look in her eyes, for he reached out. “I want her to have?—”
“Don’t you worry yourself with details. I’ll start fresh. Undergarments, dinner gowns, petticoats, crinoline, hats, gloves, shoes?—”
He stood there looking unsure. “Don’t forget everyday clothes—skirts, blouses, shawls, and a riding habit and boots.”
Riding habit, yes. She could do this for Josiah.
Clarisse laughed and shooed him away. “Katherine has a tongue in her head. We’ll not forget a thing. Run along now.”
That night in the drawing room, Katie sat on the settee near Josiah as they enjoyed their usual evening conversation. But, when he stood and turned to leave for bed, the action sparked a reminder in her. “Wait.” She stood and moved toward him, then placed her hand on his arm.
His eyes widened at her initiation of touch and flicked to her hand. “Yes.”
“I need…”
A flicker of hope filled his gaze.
She’d better hurry and finish before he got the wrong idea. “I would like some work to do during the day.”
His eyes went dull and flat. He stepped away, pulling out of her reach. Without speaking, he turned and headed for the stairs. His response was answer enough.
“What?” She hurried behind him as he climbed the steps. “What’s wrong with me helping out around here? And don’t tell me again that I need to get accustomed to my surroundings.”
He whirled around at the top. “You’re not some common maid to be scrubbing and cleaning about.”
Frustration welled inside her. “Then teach me the books, like you said you would.”
“Until the horses come in and the buying and selling begins, there is little to do.”
“Surely there are household expenses that would require some tracking. You have the maids, Annie and Ruby, helping around here, plus Delilah and Abe, not to mention my family. Surely there are expenses and I could learn how to do entries and?—”
“No.”
“Why not? I’m going stark raving mad with all this sitting around. Delilah is insistent I do nothing until you give the go ahead.”
“This is not a conversation for the whole household to hear.” He grabbed her hand and pulled her into his room, slamming the door behind them. Dropping her hand, he paced the floor before coming to stop in front of her.
“Soon, Kat. We have the complexities in our relationship to concentrate on first, and I don’t want you so exhausted from daily chores that you?—”
“So that’s what this is about? You want me good and rested to fulfill my wifely duty—an area in which you know I have failed miserably.” Now her frustration melded with fear. She would have to face the inevitable. But could she?
“Is that so wrong?” His voice sounded curt, but then he softened, his eyes gentling. “A man caring enough to not overwhelm his new bride, or a man desiring his wife?—"
“Of course, it’s not wrong.” She fought the sting of tears. “I…just can’t seem to get over…to get beyond…” Her body shuddered at the memory. “The thought of a man touching me…” Unwanted tears filled her eyes and toppled down her face.
“Can you talk about it? Does this have to do with that day at the creek or what happened in the saloon?” He reached out a hand, but then pulled back and dropped it to his side.
She motioned toward him. “See, I’ve made you afraid to even touch the woman who is supposed to be your wife. Don’t you see? I never should have married you, or anyone, in this state.”
“We can work through this, if you’ll just talk to me, tell me what happened. I’m a patient man.” His voice pleaded for her to believe him.
Poor man. He deserved better than this. “You have been patient. You’ve given my family everything you promised and I…I sit around here like a lady of leisure with no purpose whatsoever. I haven’t even upheld my end of the bargain.”
“I don’t care about a bargain. I care about you.” His voice was almost a whisper.
“That makes it even worse.” She flung her hands in the air. “You’re not the problem. It’s me.”
